pinwenslife

2009-02-09T11:54:00.000-08:00

Guys, CHanged link, www.pinlifewen.blogspot.com

2009-02-03T12:53:00.000-08:00

Forgetting the past and move forward.A deep deep impression on love and relationships in life. Recently been busy with competitions and studies , finally, it's holiday and Cny mood is going to be over soon.

2009-01-21T19:29:00.001-08:00

this post is specailly for fang yi ! :) u better read. ! haha erm wednesday, went shopping with abian and sean. first went to bugis, wanted to see the box for andrew' bike but too far and we got no time , fabian wanna meet kelly :) walk around for awhile and we went to orchard , walk around taka and hereen, damn tiring, bought 1 shirt and i pants for me, kelly bought 2 armani exchange t-shirt and one CK's t-shirt for fabian and bian bought one pants for himself. sean also bought a levi's jeans but he can't bring home, because he did not bring the unwanted jeans for the $50 dollars exchange.

After that, went to meet kelly, er jie and da jie for dinner at crystal jade, the faking noodles is damn big bowl till i can't finish and feel like vomitting. and wah da jie order so much dumplings and the xiao long bao, hahaha. was damn full.

anw, gtg :) shall blog again.

2009-01-08T07:43:00.000-08:00

SO many things happened, rather i can say , i like to store everything together and blog it at once? LOL great.

Kl trip
Crystal's birthday
Class chalet.
Liting's birthday
Christmas party
new year party
floor bal competitions.
lian xin's birthday
and my birthday.

Great i can type all the way and spoil my keyboard , haha. i Wonder is there something call a keyboard typing record machine. Recording how many times each letter or icons are being used and total up everything. LOL

I am damn sick right now despite i drank like 5 liters of water. fever, cold, sneezing the whole day. feeling damn weak. and dizzy.

Continue with my post.

starting with KL trip with my volleyball team, the team has really grow up alot as we talk more and cheer more. feel more motivated?

Eh i now damn weak i guess i have to slee4p first, shall blog again.

2008-11-24T07:39:00.000-08:00

Why i do not have a Gf for 3 years plus going to 4 years. This post is not meant to serve any objective or to influence anything, if you do not like it don't care, u have comments, tag me, but i don't think i will reply.

First, One and a half year ago, almost got into a relationship but she went away with one of my best friend that time, now he's the bastard where friends around me call him that too, not due to my influence.( while writing this, i stopped and went to her blog Archives, i feel so....)

I seriously miss that time when i spend all my time with her, sacrificing.

I shall continue, 3 things i can't stand.

1) For point 1 ,This is running in my blood, I hate girls who are materialistic and $$$ face. I am poor, but i have my pride and i promise if any girl love a bf to have transportation and rich, i will never go and have my licenses and i promise i will donate my money away. I can't understand why some girls wants their Bf to have transportation and be rich? Find a Taxi driver? or go and be a high class "waitress" ?

2) I don't like girls that love to go clubbing and love to lead a night life. Although i know teenagers now go clubs and drink to have fun but i always believe there is other ways of having fun, so if she really wants to go, a few times, i don't mind but always, everyday, every time, i can't stand it.

3) I don't like girls that is not understanding and disrespectful. Because, i am a person that does a-lot of things but only after some times then i will explain why did i do that, so if she is not understanding, there will be a-lot of misunderstandings and we will get tired of it. I will love my gf to come out with my friends and family so disrespectful is something that my friends and family will not like. Ya.

Most Girls will come into either one of the point so that's why after so long i still can't get a Gf.
Most girl and not all girls, and maybe there are only some, so meaning that i still did not find the right one.

Another reason, maybe some girls or guys feel that i am flirt and u know, as what they say, testing out which girl is the right one. Trust me if u feel this way, u are still far away from my circle of trust, meaning u still did not understand me well enough. Because when i found the right girl, i don't behave this way. From the past, the only one i go after in Rp, some of my friends in rp will understand. And why people feel that i am flirt, because i talk to most people and build relationships with them, I don't want to miss out any friends that i can make now as in the future, i will be working very hard with my careers.
As for those attached, Don't worry, i will never touch your girls, rest assure. I will never be like that bastard that took my girl away, 1 and half year ago. If i ever do this, Pin Wen is dead and you can call me bastard.

2008-11-23T07:22:00.000-08:00

So my Friday night, went out to chun fu's place to celebrate his birthday and gave him surprise. hide at his house and wanted to surprise him , but haha we didn't saw him coming back and we were chatting, so he came back and straightaway saw us by his house. So we cut cake, rest awhile and go to prata shop to eat. talk cock, went home with clarinda, the rest, stayed in chun fu's house.

Saturday, i stayed at home on the afternoon to play game, and went out in the night to find Great friends in town, and we played some games over there and chat around and slackking around, after which went over to find some of my Vb team members for drinking session, 3 couples and again i'm alone. -.-|| used to it. Eng seng and Nicole, Sin hui and Fang yi, Hui bin and his gf.
After that went over Zouk with Yong Jie to find the birthday girl, Stephh. Actually that day was quite tired and didn't want to go Zouk, but since i promise her that i'm going, So , just go, saw gerry, wei zhong, his friends, Stephhh, wei ting and their gang, Leyawn and some Rp ians. Went in walk around, see see, dance awhile, actually didn't dance? then went home, And !! This call came.
Eh Pin Wen, we got 3 person now lack of one, you want to play?, Dead, have to play, if not spoil their mood so went over to danny house, played with quan man and louis, Win 3 dollars, quite stupid but better than lose, overall louis is the only one that lose, 70 plus..

Erm, now is 1.59am so i must force myself to sleep else tml i'll be dead, PHP coding some more. So sleep! later then contiune with my saturday and the topic why i can't get a GF.

2008-11-18T07:05:00.000-08:00

ON last friday, had HTML lesson, finally a lesson that allow us to get out of the class during lesson time. Objective to learn how to use DSLR , get nice photo shoots and to come out with coding for a photo gallery.

hey, on Monday, went to school, had my PHP lesson, was a headache, finding ways to solve the problem and doing so much coding. After school had Brag game, lost but alright do better next year. After which went over to CWP to eat, initially wanted to eat MAC, but the coin flip make, me , lip min, Shi Rui and eugene to go KFC and eat. :) Had our sharing session :)

While I'm watching Channel U , damn sad that this guy don't even have money to buy a shoe, $30 plus dollars.

Erm shall contiune again, now is 5.06am so i better go sleep first take care my ffriends !:)

2008-11-17T09:14:00.000-08:00

The last Night meeting her.
We're doing shopping, and oh ya every my principal knew about me and her.
This is her, :) the most Romantic part is when i walk with her in the snow.

How should i start? been awhile since i blog.

Current feeling: Tired, Emo but motivated to see my future.

My house door is open, insecurity is everything. i feel so unsecured and fear of losing everything in my life. Including my love ones and things i have.
But, guess what, i need to look forward and be ready of challenges ahead.

Okie, great been finding blog-skin to change but can't bear to leave this. So maybe i will open a new blog :) and put this blog into history. start a-new !

Haha, i want to talk about this, maybe a-lot people might feel that blogging is some gay shit but i feel it cool, cause when i got nothing to do, haha other than watching soccer, playing games and going out with friends, i can spend sometimes here to express or even record down some important memories before everything goes different.

Anyway also many people might be wondering why my blog's background is this, why the title is Winter story, for the background, was one of the idea of how i want to express my blog, a silent and peaceful blog, a guy having his deep thoughts of having a peaceful friendships and Love.
As for Winter story, It's back in 2006, when i went Japan during winter season and i fall in love with this girl there.
It's so dramatic, Seems like the world had Stopped for that 7 days. And the story ended with a music box. Whenever i play that music from the music box, It's just like a playback of what happened in japan. If i have a chance, i will want to go back there to find her.

So last Saturday, 15th Nov 08 Went sentosa to celebrate Wen jie's birthday. meet up with Andrew, Lian Xin, Stanley, Wen jie and Chang and drive over to habourfront market, then had chicken rice. Meet up with Li ting, then went over to Sentosa. Walk to siloso beach, saw Ben and leyawn, eehhhhh, just realise oh ya Camp U & I people will be there too. Was a waste that i can't go for the camp but nvm, i have one more year in school. So had some volleyball game and soccer and then played dog and bone, play drunken man and some stupid game. Then after which went over to play ludge? or something else and the sky ride, the sky ride remind me of the genting 's free fall, DAMN Scary.! hahaha

After that went to novena , wanted to eat the steam boat, but filled with people and damn hell lot of people so we went over and want to eat international buffet plus japan cusine but also full house, so we went to Pizza hut for our dinner, i tell you it's scary, we ordered 4 BIg pizza, got one free, LOL:) then 8 plates of drumlets, 6 piece per plate, 6 garlic bread, 3 seafood platter, and 3 noodles, WAH SUper FULL TILL mad.:)

After that went over to Joo tat house , had MJ session and watched soccer. Then surprise Wen jie with a Cake :) after that went home.

while posting this post, i look through my pictures and archives.
I have been thought so much and did not blog about it, it's all very nice story and experience.
Get some nice pictures here. Shall update again.ARCHIVESARCHIVES

2008-09-21T10:32:00.000-07:00

The happy people ! w65c !! :)
Okie the happy birthday girl ! haha

That heart is my idea, ! hahaha nice right but she's not my gf :( Lol

Alright, thursday went out with w65c, the 8 of us, to celebrate felicia's birthday, although i am damn tired but i don't want to miss out anything :) so we went to fish and co for dinner , ordered some drinks and seafood platters haha and we cut cake there, okie birthday there will get people to cheer like HPT for us ! haha damn cute. shall upload pictures to explain more.

On friday, i skipped school, was to tired to wake up so went back to sleep. and wake up at 6 pm plus to go for training at PHS , floor ball alright now i am starting to love floor ball, a team game and we need tectics ! :) after that went market to eat chat , talk cock and went home ..:)

eh:) saturday i went out to ceni and watched Mirror !! with the three couples AGAIN !!!and Stanley ! my partner changed ! lol okie, i'm getting use to going out with the three couples !! okie, so as usual, mixed salted and sweet popcons and Sprite. mirror's damn irritating, they will scare u out of no where !! and i accidentally poke my mouth cos i was feeding popcons into my mouth and the sound effect scared me !! ASS !! haha and and the pulling mouth to death scene is damn damn er xin, gore !!

After that went home and i chatted with xiao tian and we chatted about ghost movies and i decided to scare myself in the night haha, so i watched ghost game, shutter and some trailers of 4bia, and those old old ghost shows., jason and fraddy. so i watched all the way till sunday morning, 7 plus 8 am. and went to sleep.

Woke up at about 3 plus pm, then packed laptop , bath and went over to tao payoh to find bian, changyy, stanley, ianrik, marc, andrew, lian xin, joo tat then went over to andrew's house for steam boat, guess what the food is so much , haha we wasted some much food but we did our best to try to finish ! it's a fair well for changyy that's going to serve the nation tml, monday. Fair well, have fun and most importantly make more friends and do things like a real men !!:)

After which, we watched 2 fast 2 furious for awhile and damn it their car is omg la dman nice,having a chance i will get a nissan fair lady or Golf GTI WHITE ! VW. ya then we started playing with pokers, the taxes poker which need some brain to play, haha their luck is good, down on mine and marc, we are alway that unlucky, i lose around 20 dollars hahabut had hell lots of fun !! great more gatherings !!

After which went home, that's sad, 3 cars, but we got no where to go cos tml changy is going in quite early, me and bian got school, marc got work. ya but nvm i love this group of friends !

This part is something for my readers, I've feelings again, but she's attached ! and is going to 2 years and i don't know her at all , how great and funny!! haha but she is just my type and she's sweet ! damn damn sweet ~ haha. shall wait, since i have already waited for 3 years plus going to 4 years for the right princess to appear !, meanwhile i will be working hard so i can provide her my every best moments and the best of me :)

Gtg, having soon 5 hours later, need some sleep ! :) now is 1.54 am ! :) nighst everyone tagg more ! share ur thoughts.

2008-09-17T12:42:00.000-07:00

Eh, life is damn boring nothing to work forward, nothing to aim nothing to do !

oh well, this few weeks been going out with jootat, liting, kelly, fabian, andrew, lian xin and marc. Simply u can see, three couple so left with marc which is my gay partner !:)

Go around singapore to try out the different food from gaylang to siglap to amk to so many places.
OH ya this is an interesting story, there is this night forget when. After going kelly house to slack, fabian and jootat fetch me home. In the end we decided to go to the resourviour to try out the car. and meanwhile i try to drive! LOl the car keep dying la at first then finally after tries, i finally manage to drive the car around.
And this part was high, we were talking about the young boy's story that he drove a swift and bang and die. Then we saw a POLICE CAR !!! when i'm driving !! hahahaah damn scary ! so jootat told me to go to the side to let the police car go thought first, cause private estate got 2 lanes but small cause got cars park there. At first i wanted to insist that the police car wait for me to go through first instead of i wait but lucky god save me , don know why i drove to the side and wait for the police car to go throught first and and and just now the car dead hahaha, so i off the engine and act as if i am alighting in from of my house !!! LOLOL hahaha lucky i got that rich face, the police didn't stop and drove off !! lol

2008-09-15T18:07:00.000-07:00

wahaha, i always thought that my blog is dead, but from my tag board , ahhaa there is still people coming in ! haha

updates !
my online store had started ! www.sensespath.co.nr : |||

My life is so empty now, i stopped volleyball because i can't commit, floor ball training has stop because many of our teammates is having exam. friend's are all busy and some is even preparing for NS, and soon they will leave. That's so sad and life is going to be empty.

i suddenly feel damn pissed, when people can't finish something, they give excuses to cover. damn it !
reach home then continue.

2008-09-10T23:20:00.000-07:00

2008-07-22T11:31:00.001-07:00

Alright, now i finally see the need for me not to tell lies anymore.

From this few weeks, understanding people around me, Amazingly, i found out so many things.
Humans are not just "Humans" in their surface.
The inner, their heart and mind which gives you the true profile on them.
Humans hide their identity so they can achieve what they want to achieve.
So many examples, So many! Humans around me are just reflecting the image created for their intension.

Usually to create that kind of image,The "Bads" need to first understand who they are influencing(preys) , then TALK as much as possible to first gain the trust from their preys and build up their image.By doing this the Bads gain a win-win situation where the Bads will take in what their preys heard and they can continue influencing their preys.
The best way to do this, what the bads usually does was to show people that they are well-informed then establish a hub system so that all informations will be transfered into this bads' hub system. Lastly the disruptive part is when the hub sends out the wrong informations or virus to corrupt other's systems.

A simple story, not many people might understand. For those that understood, don't let loose of this story as an alarm in life, After all we're working with Humans everyday.

I'm lucky i'm from HPT and is trained by many wise people.

2008-07-19T14:13:00.000-07:00

This a story i think which will brighten your day, damn cute ! LOL

A man checked into a hotel.
There was a computer in his room,
So he decided to send an e-mail to his wife.
However, he accidentally typed the wrong e-mail
address, and without
realizing his error, he sent the e-mail.
Meanwhile.....somewhere in Houston , a widow had
just returned home
from her husband's funeral.
The widow decided to check her e-mail, expecting
messages from
relatives and friends.
After reading the first message, she fainted.
The widow's son rushed into the room, found his
mother on the floor,
and saw the computer screen which read:

> > >To : My Loving Wife
> > >Subject : I've Reached
> > >Date : 16 May 2004
> > >
> > >I know you're surprised to hear from me.
> > >They have computers here now, and you are allowed
> > to send e-mails to your
> > >loved ones.
> > >I've just reached and have been checked in.
> > >I see that everything has been prepared for your
> > arrival tomorrow.
> > >Looking forward to seeing you then!
> > >Hope your journey is as uneventful as mine was.
> > >
> > >P.s It is damn hot down here !!

2008-07-15T11:15:00.000-07:00

haha happy people once again :)
Uncle !! argh i look so uncle , ahhaha wen jie is so snookkkk. lol
our seafood dinner:) damn much food that we can't finish.
at home, our kota tinggi rainforest resort. a nice place ,with nice people.
:))))
Candid:)
the adidas gang :)
trekking home :)
smiles:) happy people.
preparing to go on the trek.
smile , waiting for others buying lunch for us :) happy people :)
caught on action.
I'm the holy one :)
haha the big big waterfall.
My myammar friend, Puiser hiumantia. LOL
pause for a picture :)
so sweet, hahahah
the first waterfall
the trekk:)

· Lost ez-link card

· 2.3hr to reach gaylang from woodlands, 961

· marcus's birthday at RCC

· Competition at tp, volleyball.

· Pelapah waterfall trip.

· Reagen's birthday at hardrock.

All this happened so fast.
I lost my ez-link card after playing number ball at AMK hub. first time and i lost that nice red colour holder that i like so much :( but that is not sad enough. After that i took cab down to Zouk then i realise so i called my guy friends to help me buttttt surprisingly they told me that they were too tired that they don't to help me to go back to search for my ez-link card, i was at Zouk and if i go back my cab fare would be like 50? so they are nearer, thats why i ask them to help. But what i got were excuses. Then i tried calling my girl's friends i call 3 and most of them are willing to help, how could this be? When you guys need help, i'm always there but i need help the most ? where did you guys go? this further show that my previous posts were true.

(i forget when but the incident goes like this after school met up with joiice and jack we went over to gelare and have our waffle with ice creammmmmm.lol after which i went over to interchange so take 961, i waited for 20 minutes then the bus arrived. so i board the bus, I asked the uncle how long would I reach Gaylang, he confidently said 1hr. So, I’m like ok! Then I fell asleep, I set alarm and wake up 20 minutes later, I’m around Bukit Panjang. So I just look around and sleep awhile for 15 minutes, I’m around Bukit Timah. So I didn’t sleep anymore. I watched my journey to Gaylang. After 1hr and 30minutes I am still at near Bugis area, so I am damn piss off and approach the uncle, and the uncle seems to start defending himself before I even start talking so, I just alighted on the next stop as he say the journey will take another 30minutes to reach gaylang.. that’s like 2hrs to reach la. So after I alighted, I went to find cab and I can’t get a cab for 10minutes, after which I walk to a taxi stand and sit and wait for a cab, no cab for 20minutes, then I book a cab, the operator was so rude to put me on hold when she is talking to me half way. Then I wait for the taxi to be book after 6minutes, no cab is available how unlucky I can be ? then I call another company, comfort finally I got a cab, so I walk to the place I ask the cab to pick me up , Guess what , there is a available cab at the taxi stand .. WTF ? that’s not the worst, then I saw The bus 961 with the same uncle at the bus stop beside where I wait for the booked cab.meaning the bus cross gaylang and come back already. WTHHHH? …. So had some nice session with my AO friends. The worst is here, when we were going home, we took the last few trains to city hall so after which I alighted alone to go on the red line as the rest is on the green line, Know what ? I took my laptop, jacket and bean curd but I left my bag with Ben, super suayyy.. okie.

After which on Thursday, I had work at RCC, raffles country club at tuas, it’s the best job ever. Reach there at 8pm was late, supposed to reach at 7.30, start working at 9, set up for locker room, we were fast as we are experienced. So after that we rest awhile and we play erm? Catching? LOL damn fun ? then it’s marcus’s birthday, we just pin him on the floor and start taking out his pants then all of us start spraying moisturizers and hair cream or what ever, then, he is like chasing after me ? But lucky I ran fast enough, he changed target, haha and ahtat lost his slipper,lol. So eat the cake and our free Mac meals, company’s treat, after which work another 30mins and go home, how good men? Most of the time playing and eating and pay was damn good. I’ll miss marcus after he quit, the memories is …..

After which is the pelapah waterfall trip, I’m to some friends that were not informed but I’m in the center so I’m hard to make any decision too. So in the morning I slept around 4 plus in that morning and wake up around 6 plus, omg la 2 hours sleep. Then meet up with wenjie and people at kranji, after which had our breakfast and went over to the check point, we took bus but haha what a long jam so we alighted and walkto the check point, meng siong and people went to get the lunch we are eating at the waterfall so the rest of us clear the custom first. So after that we waited at the stairs, O.o quite long but thanks for the foodJ then headed to find a cab, Woot, manage to find a 7 seat one so 7, me, sheemun, Jeremy, yi en, puiser, cyrena and ah hao shared, so we were first to reach , the cab was cool, with dvd player, haha so we watched the hulk 2 , haha. We arrived first then prepare meanwhile the rest arrived too. Went in the trek and ya the waterfall is damn nice after that went for seafood dinner. okie I shall upload some picture. Pictures tells a thousand words.

Lastly is reagen’s birthday at hardrock café, O.o the environment was not bad, haha we reach there and start drinking beer, stupid haven eat anything, so waited for the rest to arrive, me and Clarinda and chun fu, were planning what to eat later.lol so funny.ehhh after that reagen came so ordered, 5 main course and 1 shared, but the serving is …. Damn big… none of us finish, we order, steak, fish, burgers, chicken , ribs, salad , wings, and some more I cant remember, not really nice. So the band came over and sang birthday song for him reagen. Had a nice night, I always love being with them.

My competitons , erm lost all the matches , lol but we will work hard don worry, shall blog again about competition after I finish everything, damn long and naggy la the post also, lol

2008-07-04T05:03:00.000-07:00

Recently not been resting well, hence Thursday and Friday ponned school. Wednesday went to out with Marc and people to catch Hancock, maybe a bit touching cos i always had that feeling that he is facing, people neglect you. When i am doing something to benefit everyone and being helpful people scold, Shut up !. Thats so hurting. Through time, i have became more and more insensitive and emotional less.

I don care about people's feeling anymore as people don't care about mine. I have now become less busy body, any problem i see i try to ignore unless it hits my value bank hard then i'll help. unless you come to me, as people see me in trouble but stand some where as far as possible and look at me and how i suffer. ok NOW STOP BEING EMO !! haha

Now i have took up so much commitment, although i see lots of friends but i still feel empty inside me, i still have not meet my partner. Recently i took up Alpine leadership pro gramme, training, Climbing up the stairs with bags weighting 8 to 10 kg, running 3 to 8 km per training session , one week 4 trainings. Thats so ... much of commitment but i am up to it, it trains to me be a mountaineer, but weather i go up and climb those mountain is another question as i need approvals from family, friends and my fear and also the correct and sufficient knowledge. I went japan on winter season i almost go into the coffin twice. I'm weak i know.

2nd commitment, volleyball, competitions is on that near corner. Although i'm not in that main 6 and it's my first time to be sitting on bench for sports, i'm ok, cause i have the passion, serious. training twice a week, not really though trainings but theory wise can make you sleep, haha but must listen cause sound correct, our coach is damn cute, if we win nyp for the first match, he treat us bbq or go PUB 3 containers, which is like, drink till you siao ! lol

3rd , my mini business, i have been meeting clients, doing up website, and doing so many things till i am so tired and troubled over it so much, i'm sorry friends if my words were hash, but i mean good for everything only. i'mmmm sorryyyyyyy .

Anyway i gtg , shall blog again.

2008-06-22T01:56:00.000-07:00

ON friday, 20th june 2008, a wonderful day have my IT security lesson, was not bad, manage to understand bits and pieces as i had ponned so many weeks. So after lesson was UT, Arghh cant do, most probably a C or a D grade. haha sad. So before i left the class, i said something, haha i say: " Faci, i'll come for your lessons, no more pon ! ". lol erm doubt so ? haha hope so? LOL. And during my second break out i finaly bought my black book for ideas, anyone interested can ask me whats that about.

After which i went to meet person A ermm... someone took cab over to mrt to fetch that person A? Then head down to east coast for BBQ session, before that went to buy some food and Sushi, best, favourite, remind me of japan trip. Their sushi is the best and bento. After which headed to bbq pit which is 39 and we walked all the way from 16 to 39 which is damn far with my heavy laptop? Had some dancing session and birthday session ? lol and gossip session ?

After which went over to east coast to meet joice and people, wei quan , wen jie , jack, gary , winnie, reagen, eileen, colin and people hpt and celebrate joice birthday ! happy birthday !:) Ate at cavana because they say the ambiance and environment is good?, i have better and more romantic place for chill out ! haha, wanted to order but they wanna go for the next acttivity, pool haha so i went to 7-11 for some food. then went up for pool, don feel like playing so i on my lappy and show some of my pictures and hpt pictures when we were like sec 2 , so memorable !! haha

After which took cab home and changed, went out to danny's house and start our mah jong session ! haha , draw-draw for Croatia and turkey, i won , and mah jong i also won, haha double joy. after which went home sleep.

then saturday night went to town for movie, the Zohan ! erm quite funny la , haha but some how they are bringing out some messages for United states? Go watch it to brighten up your day. i love the telephone part. press a lot number one, shall not elaborate , go watch and find out yourself.:) after which went home, waited for Holland, my favourite team to start playing, okie they are not performing. and i lose, haha nvm , gogo ! goal !! jia you Holland .

Currently mood, guess a bit mad? happy don't know for what ? lol
Signed off sunday 22th june 08, 5.45pm.

2008-06-16T11:01:00.000-07:00

First day of school, started with Java lesson. i guess i have a little bit of talent in this module? i can understand the codes but some i still need to find out more and practice more. First day that i took bus to school because i met Kelly and Fabian and they usually take that so i followed. We people are lazy, ya true and i am too, if i have a choice to take Mrt and bus i will but don't waste money save it for the future and everyday walk to school would be a good excerise too. lol

Okie, for previous post alot people i am damn emo, actually abit ba i bought all the bad things that happened into picture. This is something that is so amazing, no matter what happened unless you die, life still carry on so no point being sad everyday. Just hope for tml's happiness, create today's joy and learn from the past.

Been spending money everyday, arghh not saving at all, watch movies , go eat good food, go sing drink, go around Singapore and play, but i don't think i have enjoyed. Today i went for a talk after lesson, which is this project call the alpine leadership pro gramme where we will be a part of the mountaineers where we climb ice and snow mountains. If i'm selected, this year end i will be climbing my first at china ,an easy one for them but don't think for me ? Shall see how , no ones know about this only me and ben took part.

Anyway was waiting for my supper so i just blogged but now the supper is here and i am damn hungry so i will...... STOP here lol bye !

2008-06-10T12:53:00.000-07:00

2 predictions i gave this relationship.

She still have a bf and her mind weaved.

She Already broke up with her bf and now finding another.

i don't really care cause life's not about finding a perfect life partner, but to find one that grow old with you and build the paper house steps by steps into a solid home with you which brings you memories to talk about in the old days.

I may be easily fall in love with any girls , but once i fall in love, i give everything that i can do for her and promise my Time and soul to be by her side.
Now, after reflecting my past relationship i can swear i have not fall in love with anyone, W___ or any rumours thats pasting around. Cause simply, no one has yet to fill that hole in me.
All the past experience that i had will only make me harder and harder to get into relationships.

Interested did not mean i fall in love, but just if i should just give love another try when i failed so many times.

Haha sometimes, i think it's so foolish and i feel like laughing at myself, haha. foolish young boy?

Love is confusing, that i can say?

Reflecting on past relationships after my last gf?

3 years had past, how many times i tried to stand up and go after a relationship that i feel worth for my life? haha how many times i have failed or maybe how many percent? 100% Failures.

First was L_____, i was too afraid to tell her my love? so i showed through actions, the breakfast i promised you? The birthday that i put in so much effort .
so she did not know and went away with a Butch ? no one would ever understand these feelings?

Second was S_ ____, every occasions that i see you, i promise to send you home. you love cookies, i promise to buy for you whenever u're running out of it. i Changed to drink 7 up when i dislike. i stay awake so that i can make sure you are not disturbed when u're asleep when going home? I feel so bad whenever you're staying out late and i can't promise you a transport home, hence i disturb my brothers and friends so that u will reach home safe? The pictures i took when u 're sleeping that i want to surprise you, but this will never happen anymore? you ran away with not anyone but one of the close bro i had when i am feeling the worst. how hard more can this hit my emotions and heart?

Another sad story? when you forget to take your shoes i bought it down for you but you took for a slave and i should do it? When i spoil your waterbottle i change the brand of bottle that you are using and bought a extra cap for you in case you spoil it yourself. When you come towards me and hand me that banana skin and walk away? i throw it like i should do it? When you msg me and tell me you need to get something from army market, i never think and answered yes? when i slept only 3 hours and wake up for the trip. i bought not only one that you should return to your friend for that one you spoil ? but i bought 2 cause i want you to have one for yourself but not using other people's?

and all the other small small things that i had done is stupid and unless.
how foolish i am?
haha, Maybe i won't do all this anymore for anyone, i shall think for myself first and be self fish ?

And all those relationships that i saw and heard had slowly made me to feel disgusted.
Too be too good was never to be a good thing that i found on a relationship cause another party always took it for granted but my believe is, when i love you means my everything is yours no matter how you treat it.
I will never initiate the next relationship that i am or will be having, simply cause i hope you can ensure me and show me by initiating the first few steps to show me that you're willing to sacrifice and after which i will take the rest of the steps i should.

I may not be rich,
I may not be good looking,
I may not have a good family background,
I may not be sweet,
But what i can promise is that my heart and soul will always be ready for you whenever you need me.

This entry may be stupid and pointless,
but it's all from my heart and how i felt at this point in time.

5.34am end.
Sign off~ Pin wen.

2008-06-07T08:12:00.000-07:00

Erm, after so long i finally feel like blogging. After going through so much things! Another part of my love life, another face of my camp life, my though for the world changed.

Recently been ponning school for camps( Dunman high and Innova Jc ) and works, all this enriched my life.

Dunman high camp was damn fun , their preparation for the camp was damn good.
Then was cypher leadership training camp which falls on 2nd and 3rd june, i'm the Overall in-charge but some how kai le, kelly and ram helped me a lot. was damn serious on the first day when they first come in my face is like not smiling at all but as the day goes on , lol my jokes and my natural side came out and i became the joke of the camp again. but lucky i manage to get things done.
On the second day morning , was hell 7.30 report and only around 10 people arrived so we all were doing pumping till everyone comes.

Okie friends, currently i am taking up much commitments so that i won't feel so lonely and feel occupied. I am also working on my business, but weather it works or not, is still a future stands. do support me.
i hate people who looks down on people.
I'll get you one day.

shall blog again , lazy le haha

2008-01-29T12:49:00.001-08:00

alright. monday , 21st jan , went to malaysia for some shooping but cant find anything to shopp :(
tueday , arghhh ponned school and took cab and went over to fel's dad's funeral, damn sad. reach there and really don know what to say. so ask if she eaten and went to buy some food for her and family with ram. stayed there for the whole day, hope that she will feel better. fel, you gonna stand up, i know it is very sudden. me and kai le and the other cypher will be here supporting you , need help, you needa to say alright . ! kai le and me is afraid if you don't want to say , please please let us help you ! we are good friends. Or i won't pon and rush down le.

Wednesday after school went over to town with chun fu, shop around and waited for the others to come and went over to newton for a dinner and a good luck dinner for clarinda. had some fun , and chat around while also choosing what to eat, as usual, stingrays and those BBq foods.

thursday , after school went over to phs , for floor ball training , had 2 goals feel so great :) that day was o-level result release and many got good grades and some just not very good. JJ and karen, ying ying had there grades too, they past and guess karen didn't get some thing she wants?
erm after training , faster rush home to bath and went to amk hub to find clarinda , cos she's feeling sad for her result, and when i reach Mos burger ask her whats her grade. And WTh L1 R4 is 13 !! wth !! so i know why she complained , cos of her english. she expected A1 or A2 but , b4?. so we chatted and we moved to Nebo for my dinner. after which share cabbed with clarinda home, and chun fu took mrt alone, lolx.

erm friday was WTH !! haha , went home and changed before going to east coast. meet jie rui, wen jie, and ah tat and went over to east coast, find a place at the seafood village and booked then we went over to rent bicycles. cycle back , and i was riding 2 bikes at once, lolx total, we rented 7 bikes, 2 couple bikes and the rest is single.
then we were riding over to the restuarant , we were so unlucky, as the birthday boy, andrew manage to hear us, as this is a surprise and he is not suppose to know we are around, lian xin, the Gf told us wth that they were at mac, we were riding and suddenly i start chasing ah tat,, and he shouted AE 86 and start dashing and the bottle on the basket dropped , i saw and i shouted oI!I!! pick up and wenjie were behind us and !!! andrew is so just nice beside us at the table bind folded and for this he heard us..... then we locked all the bike near the SKi 360 and went up to the restuarant call Jambo, wanted to go NO name, but just try jambo lor. then we waited for every one to come. and what , hahaha andrew was bind folded and we paka with another table and put him there and we went to hind , when he unfold himself, hahahaha he saw the people infront of him that he don't know and he was so shocked. LOL, after that we start eating, he ordered the food which we wanted to eat , lolx. then after which went over to joanna's Car and gave him the surprise, all the presents were in the cAR boot. took some picture and play the treasure hunt with him while waiting ah tat to fetch liting home.
ah tat came back and we started our journey, lol all the way to changi village , woot. on the way chatted and look around, chatted with stanley and ah tat on the way , ahhaa talk about our own story, haha my same old story. I seriously want to get a good GF after 4 years being single and got so many sad love stories. :( so we reached changi village and eat the lasi lemak.lolx and went to old changi hospital, me , andrew, wen jie and ah tat went up , lol half way police came LOL, and we went out . lolx after that we went to changi board walk, haha hope one day i can go there with my lol gf. dreaming about it now ,lolx that place is romantic. after that haha ride back to east coast , whao thats very tired !! lolx , and we rest at bedok bridge. then went over to mac. morning, return bike and joanna fetch us home.

sleep all the way till saturday night and went to help abit only , on painting jie rui's house, but better than nothing hor , lolx then went to lian xin's house to watch godzilla , lolx and went home sleep. sunday ,, nothing much , stayed at home and at night meet great friends for dinner !

End of my week ! LOL

2008-01-20T12:14:00.000-08:00

This picture's done by chunfu, damn nice !! haha, i like it.

This is a small test i do online , ivy sent me this link.

i did not edit but seriously i think all the points are true and valid, lolx

erm but i am not promoting myself la, i do behave and think like this.

Get to know yourself better

Your view on yourself:You are intelligent, honest and sweet. You are friendly to everybody and don't like conflict. Because you're so cheerful and fun people are naturally attracted to you and like to talk to you.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:You are a true romantic. When you are in love, you will do anything and everything to keep your love true.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.
The seriousness of your love:You are very serious about relationships and aren't interested in wasting time with people you don't really like. If you meet the right person, you will fall deeply and beautifully in love.

Your views on educationEducation is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.

The right job for you:You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.

How do you view success:You are confident that you will be successful in your chosen career and nothing will stop you from trying.

What are you most afraid of:You are afraid of things that you cannot control. Sometimes you show your anger to cover up how you feel.

Who is your true self:You are mature, reasonable, honest and give good advice. People ask for your comments on all sorts of different issues. Sometimes you might find yourself in a dilemma when trapped with a problem, which your heart rather than your head needs to solve.

2008-01-14T19:02:00.000-08:00

Have i uploaded this picture before? i think it's cool the edits of it and it's me :)

ME and Auntie Oh !

all the people that went sentosa :)

Uncle Tan and Auntie OH

Melvin extra , wah lao ! hahaBilly , ruth pin wen and jie ying.

Brother billy and ME ! haha

alright saturday, went sentosa with ivy, ruth , billy , melvin and cheng X___ don't know how to spell, was early and went over to buy newspaper and sat at vivo to read. so ruth arrived and soon, billy arrived and waited for ivy.then went over to the market for breakfast and drive into sentosa. and we arrived too early again , seat there and do nothing , then took some pictures after sometime the games starts and went around playing vollyball, soccer and captain's ball. jump into the water and swim around , as usual saw the volleyball players dominating the court, haha we got trashed, well was thinking if i should go back to volleyball , i miss those days that we spend most the time together playing volleyball. took more photos and after which wash up and went over to vivo for some food , ivy meet her friend jannah and we went home. reach home change and went over to zouk cause of yong jie's birthday , i was damn tired. but nvm , he signed 10 people in zouk i guess? i forget actual number, i saw my cousin , chuan in there. after that went home.

Sunday went from ROM, my cousin's marriage so went over to a condo at kallang viewing the kallang river reached and saw most of my relatives except for some that is not free and did not attend, had some food and chatted , the sky turn dark and started raining , so we move indoor and i saw one ah ma fall down, OMg la sure very pain , i feel sorry man, and i scare anything but lucky she is fine. after which went home rest and prepared for monday's lesson .

Monday went kelly lim's house after school brought chicken rice and done our dinner at her house. i fall asleep while kelly and bian with with DS lite. wake up and my turn to play, the car game is so fun . anyway really thanks to kelly's family , treated me so good, lappy and most of the time asking me to eat or events . but i feel so bad, not meeting up the grades from my results in rp , i'm sorry , i don't wish to skip school but i can't cause i need to work. i know it's a excues , but i feel stress too, what i can do is sorry and i promise i will lead my life a proper one and benefit the society.

Tuesday went for jack's birthday, after school meet chun fu at yck mrt, and his friend 's laughing at my thick eye brown, so sad.:( then we went over to marina square to shop around. and went to mac for some food cos i was really too hungry. then went over to seoul garden booked for 13 people but in the end we went kenny roger, had some food, and every one arrived. his birthday was great. after which went over to a KTV pub at thomson , call talk cock sing song... weird name. sang some song and play pool and went home. and thanks bao yun for that godiva chocalate.

Wednesday went cypher meeting, after school , sotalked about the games and went walk around the school for night walk route. nothing much , after which went to burger king for dinner and chatted about melvin's story and my story, lol pei ling was there to just listen.

Thursday went town with chun fu to shop around then meet clarinda and slack at coffeee bean and was chatting with so many things and decided to come out with our own langaue , Shashi means gathering and now we coming out with our number sequences. lol. were chatting about business online and offline , and chatting about all sort of ideas. and went home through the new tunnel which is so nice. but stupid cause further away from taka that area, but clever cause now they can attract more peopel to borders side and nowthe mrt are further people will have to make a choice .

Friday went to NP to watch NYp vs Rp 's floor ball final. Erm i can say it is damn damn damn exciting la, Sim won NUs , for womens, and after awhile the mens final starts , both rp and nyp were strong but rp was stand abit better as team dynamic were strong and training is enough , hence nyp had a tough fight.3rd quauter which is the final one last 5mins , RP is leading 5- 2 and some of nyp 's gave up , this did not last long . After this hero that score the 3rd goal, nyp's player's motivated and try again for that goal and after a while they score and the score comes to 5-4 with final 1 min, and this was drama , when every think that nyp is going to lose, andrew the big fucker, lolx which is the defender pick up the ball with no people marking him , he try the shot and WTH , that Ball went in the net and 5-5 , the match draw and came into extra time , with a golden goal, and guess who score, WTf andrew score again , and i shouted like hell, his the fucking big Hero !! hahaahsuper drama even those that don't really intend to support anyone , lol became so excited and shouted as well. that was really call glory , as for rp side, they are damn fucking sad, if i put myself in their shoe, but nvm it's a experience , complacent is bad, after that had some pizza and KFC for some celebration. If the black guy ever give up and did not score the 3rd goal , this glory will nv be NYP's. then went home.

Saturday went ah tat house play MJ, play four POK , lolx lose $35 damn sad. but joanna lose $80 erm don't worry be happy money are out there to be earn, to be happy is more important since it've happened already. had our chicken chop as dinner and supper was some unhealthy bee hoon and mee, damn oily :) but MAN U won 2-0 . Victory and title MAN U , work hard and it'll be yours again.

Sunday stayed at home, wanted to go out for some shopping but no one was available to accompany me so stay ed at home and went to marc's house for some chatting session and went over to 631 for dinner. reached home and play some dota and meet andrew, lian xin ,wen jie they all for supper, had fruits and now reach ed home and finally feel like blogging.

i envy the couples so much , a relationship needs both side to contribute and i will wait for such relationship instead and looking for such relationship as it don't works most of the time.

2008-01-10T12:52:00.001-08:00

There are more pictures shall upload again , need some sleep, now is 5.35 am !! haha today is friday, later still have lessons ! bye !again me and my pretty ladies !:)

me and lian xin and gang ! haha

me and great friends !!

Me and my cakes !! :)

Cute auntie taking picture with me=)))
Cute Auntie Giving me Ang bao ! :)

me and joyce , erm i like this picture alot, but .... it's the past ! move on !! lolx

me and zhen hui !

me and muneeer !!

me and shu hui !

Me and my pretty Ladies !

Great friends !!

On 7th Jan , alright first day of school , went to school without much sleep, reach class, some greeted me with happy birthday pin wen ! was happy but for this year's birthday didn't expect much , 19th after first meeting , went out to buy food and came back to the class, and after 2nd meeting stright away i went to sleep, lying on the floor and fall asleep, after a while yuan and shan shan called me asking if i am hungry and what i want to eat , so i was sleeping i told them anything will do, after awhile i state , erm waffle from w4 , i really hate w1 's waffles cause it taste so weird. then anydrinks along, i say honeydew ba, so shan shan bought the drink and yuan lin bought the waffles over, after awhile the class sang happy birthday song for those jan babies. my class gave me a small present, a necklace with my name and rulan actually made something which has meaning, erm don't know how to describe whats that but really, meaningful. thanks so much !! erm, actuall was feeling sad, as in rp except my class mates, no other people actually remembered my birthday, cypher, my brothers, i remembered that you said you will give me a surprise during my birthday and i put so high hope on it but haiz, fasle hope, nvm, maybe you are busy and held up with things.

so decided to leave the school earlier as there is no point staying in school, so boring. meet jack and went over to amk hub and wwalk around , was deciding of what to eat , went to fish and co. and erm it don't look nice at all, then walk around decied to go nebo to slack and eat. so rest there , the female staff there was quite cute? LOL then took out my lappy and play with it, then jack starts doing his homework, how boring ? 2 person and both of us are doing our things? haiz how boring is my birthday , so at 7 jack went so called went home, wth lolx he didn't went home but lie to me and i went to kahtib mrt station to find zhen hui as she dated me :) .

reached there and saw, woot! greats friends are there !! what surprise is that going to be?LOL then i saw a message, LOL martin sms and said that, " happy birthday bro, i can't attend your dinner !!! gahahah, then my ang bong is on the way." erm from here i know that we are having dinner. LOL then saw shu hui alone so chat with her while waiting for others to come. then Joyce tan , fabian and kelly reached, after a while zhen hui and muneer reached, so we went over to 844 to eat our 11 course meal. LOL

while was choosing our food , this auntie which is damn cute , and zhen hui start to bagin the price with that auntie, haha damn funny , their conversation . auntie say steady la i give you good price la. lolx so ordered our food and chat along. took some pictures and started eating.
finish eating and they ask me to cut the donut cake , so cute .lol after which they gave me their presents, the funny auntie actually gave me an ang bao ! how nice, thanks ! great friends, jian wei and people gave me ang bao's too. then bian and my pretty ladies gave me a FCUK IT
T-shirt and a piere cardin's wallet.and andrew and gang, lian xin ,stanley and his gf and ah tat was here and , what a idea they expose my secert about me and joyce,.... i feel so ma lu and .... i hope she won't be angry or anything and even they a packet of sweet wanted me to do that with her !! wth !!! never happen okie, i don't dare and she don't want ! anw thanks so much ! alrigth then took pictures and change into the new T-shirt and after that went home, as i need to meet chun fu ,

then chun fu was saying that he will be riding down to my house with his bicycle, so i gave him this challange to reach my house before 12, so i reached home and onlined while waiting after a while chun fu reach and say that we will go amk , kai ling's house , wah so i faster rush to the bath room and bathe . What the hell !! when i came out from the bathroom with one towel, first person i saw was reagen , then kai ling !!! arghH ! so ma lu ! i was wearing one towel only !! lucky it didn't drop ! haha then they were holdingg on to the birthday cake! thanks so much, after that then i realise my day was being planned , when i was with jack at nebo , reagen was outside walking around and i didn't saw it then when jack says he is going , he lied cause he is meeting chun f , reagena nd kai ling ,!! haha anw thanks for that surprise, i really can't guess or what and was really surprise,.!!

lastly, this year's birthday was so special, all the most important people in my life are presented and gathered , i really hope every year , my birthday can be a gathering of all my friends, my important people in life , i feel so loved with you guys around , we have been through the up and down , helping each others to get through the hard time and spend the happy times together. i love you people ! you guys are so special to me !! =) those that are not true , will be filtered through time.

2008-01-10T11:51:00.000-08:00

Arghh, i have a retarded face ! haha

i with my pretty ladies ! :)

Us, muneer, kelly, up lian xin ,back to row, cherlyn, liting ,up again markkk, back to row, cai lin, zhen hui and me !

lian xin and Andrew, what a lovely couple ! i envy !!

On 5th of jan , went over to lian xin's birthday , meet eugene and muneer at kallang and went over . so me and muneer and small sean, fabian , and martin actually shared the presents a ear ring and a heel. then reach ed there and saw so many people , had some fun , and chatting ,after that starts to cut cake, and after that again we were chatting and catch up with everyone , like a gathering session , then took some pictures, after which when most people lefted , we went into the chalet and starts to play with poker cards and those that loses would drink the alcohols, chivas and pear volka. anyway pear volka and 7-up is nice. then the girls went to sleep ,

so the guys , wen jie, andrew, joo tat, ian, ianrik and stanley ,we went over to cheer at down town , then decided to go red house, so while walking , we starts to talk about some ghost stories and it start to be so eeerieeeee. so after that reach ed and walk around and went to the beach and sit on the rocks and start talking about the moon and the stars and the planets, anyway that place is so romantic again , if i were to bring a girl that.LOL, then walk back to chalet ,went to sleep. the next day wake up and packed everything and me stanley and his gf joanna,

went over to joanna's house , waited for wen jie , and we start our mah jong session , played till night time, and i lose $18 , wen jie 10 and joanna lose 20? all to stanley, haha he is so lucky. that day .lol then went over to sembawang to eat chicken chop, then went home, awaiting for the next day which is my birthday. thats the end.LOL

2008-01-10T11:33:00.000-08:00

President is is just behind me with his white merc ! lol

the romantic birdge!

this is my friend's, lol

Nice view!

me and my cousin RAi !

Me with great friend s !!!lolx

boss which is in black alight the car and was having some serious discussions.

Look ahead, all the BMW are waiting for me LOL i will own one in the future.

Don buy 4D with the car plate ahead hor ! if you win , please treat me to eat ! lol

3rd of jan , went to reflection of the carribean, the very expensive condo at near sentosa. with fabian , quan man , marc and rai , so we 5 are working , after eating our lunch we went over to the condo to report, so we are briefed or what to do and was split up into 2 groups , me and quan man and the rest one group . and for this event, 12 BMW 7series and 3 X5 BMw was involve which add up of cost of few million. so we went for trail , hence me and quan man hop up the 7 series but some how we hop into the wrong car, hahaha was scolded feel damn bad la , but it's because 2 instructions was given , afterall is me and quan man that is not clever enough to spot the mistake car. okie nvm move on, we went over to the show room and quan man is with his t-shirt so decided to hide it somewhere inside the grass and trees ahaha so stupid, after that again the 7 series fetch us for a trail as president is coming later then we had our lunch at TCC , companies' treat. then at around 8 our work begins. and ended at 10. anw the views are best and alsowho ever that stays there are super rich and enjoy cause that places is so romantic too, especially the brigde.! pictures time.

2008-01-08T08:10:00.000-08:00

alright 2007 28th dec went to procon christmas party, with bian and marc, was lolx damn fun i can say , at 50s pub went up there eat some food drink beer and play pool and haha sing song. !! the entire function room is ours ! have fun, free flow beer, free flow food, every thing is nice, then we sang friends, the chinese song, all the crews and macus lead... Afterwhich , we had some game session when we play with dices and 5 , 10 , 15, macus played with boss, so when he lose, .... Dots we will drink, lolx when he win , boss will drink.

we drank 5 cups, boss one cup only:( sad la.LOL

After which went to zouk , at 3.45am, but zouk close at 5? quite lame, so went over, arghh that bastard is really a.... just dance and fool around with unknown girls, hey come on la , you have a girlfriend already please be loyal !! Ah i have never go against someone so strongly before, anyway he tried to use the drank excuse and make the chance to want to he hao, be my friend again, i push him away and say ahh.. get lost. after that went over to thamson to eat , lolx even the girl which is terence's friend is so scare of that bastard hinding awAY from you.. how does this says about you?

alright move on to 31st dec, argh last day of 2007, unstable year , and so many things happened to me. meet andrew and tat and went over to cable car station, thinking that we will be taking the cable car to mount faber and oh ya tat saw this girl alighting from a mazda 5 i think and he was saying wah chio bu alighting and it's too loud so maybe the chio bu heard and know what ? the girl is our staff lolx. okie so after that haha we took a pickup instead , alright reached and boss gave his briefing. so i was station at the cable car station to welcome all the guest. this time, really , we took cable car over , lolx after reaching there slack awhile and started work at 7, after most of theguest arrived we took cable car back to mount faber and rest . railey , andrew and tat helped a photographer to bring her equipment up to the rooftop of the mount faber which have the best view , meaning the top most place for mount faber and so we climb up too and wah that place is so romantic !!! the cool breeze and feeling is woah , if i ever could bring a girl up here , it will be soo sooo sooooo romantic , lolx so went down again to the cable car station , and watch the fire works , arghh and the fire works are release from the cable cars , argh damn nice . ! stop here and i 'll show pictures !

2007-12-27T11:45:00.000-08:00

okie, 24th christmas eve, woke up and rush over to boon lay , suppose to reach 2.30pm, but late for awhile, sorry. went for a meaningful session at city havest church at jurong for a chirstmas skit play, watched and find it nice , funnny and professional. But some how the message is to say that this christmas, "give" and love, alright i like it weird but which is true , you are there and is living such a good life better than others so we must give or help in which we can do. after which went over to amk to meet great friends. they wanted to watch the legend, i rush over and find out that all of them had a partner and i don't, but i don wish to sit alone so i bought 2 tickets feeel so sad, asked people to accompany me, but some hwo can't find , but i remembered i called her, lin but sadly she's still with.... and i think somehow the whole relationship of me and her has changed. life is like that. so nvm , decided to sit alone on that couple sit. but sean wee decided to come so i got a partner but after awhile quan man wants to watch , so i though of going shannnon's house to celebrate so just nice everyones' happy , so i didn't watch and went over to shannon's house, wanted to take cab , cos the time is 12 plus but great friends ssay still got train so took train over and ask chun fu and people to waited, reach and saw winnie and she say Oh they lefted only left me and you and we need to wait for fishy, so after fishy came went over to my house and i bathed, and went over to express 2000 find chun fu and people. serious feel so sad, when people seems to pin high hope on me and sometimes even press things on me and say that i'm at fault indireactly. especially those people that i cherish and really take as great people in my life. okie , life is getting more and more sad for me . after that went over to shannon's hosue and i started mixing the alcohols and while i'm trying taste, my face turned so red while every's laughing at me. sometimes i just like that yes i know so much and i need to take care of myself, but don know why sometimes i seriously feel like being a normal person that don know anything and don held any respondsibility , this word hit and make my back so heavy. had some rest and fall asleep, didn't really get a good rest.

In the morning , almost everyone looks drank, HPT drank spirit !:) then went out to eat at thomsom area, and went straight to colin's house to have our mah jong session , what the hell ,damn tired la. then played, had much fun , his house got so many hamster and makes me think back of my white hamster, i was so afriad that it will pass away so i gave to someone , cause i don't wish to see it pass away and i think i can't take care of it proberly. I remembered when i am out , i scare it will be bored, i pack my room and put it in there to play, run around the room and i place food around for it to eat and drink. after which went home , and was so damn tired, fall asleep once after bath when reach home.

then was waiting joo tat to call, then finally he called so went over to cherlyn's house and gave liting a birthday surprise, okie, i think she's darn lucky that people give her surprisealmost every year, i feel that surprise is the best present you can ever received, it takes time and your heart to plan. joo tat sang happy birthday song with the guitar which is sweet. and bought her a camera. bian and kelly , joo tat and li ting , they are all so sweet when can i have such sweet relationship.

after that went home.

Wednesday, 26th , sleep and rest around at home and went to express to meet martin ,marc, shuai hui and jia hao. saw jia hao's dog which is cute ! then meet yong jie and sebas and went over to zouk. talked about those gambling stuffs , how people lose and died, and how people win and become rich. and seriously each time i go club , i realise this thing , without money , you're an ass. and i don't know why i'm changing and becoming to face the stupid fact , and i just feel tthat i am going to change to a bad guy soon. there's no force stopping me.

thursday went out to work for the car plate thingy and went shopping , bought my 6th jacket in Zara and my first fourskin t-shirt, the KOPI-O t-shirt . finally manage to get myself something instead of the past where , i buy cookies, buy this buy that for a girl that hurt me so much. i finally realise , first person to love is yourself. And thats why My EQ is getting lower, i don care how people feel as long as i get myself save and happy. It's you guys that took me for granted that cause me to become such a person , i use to be nice and think of how you guys feel, but haha you all never even think for me and how i feel why must i think for you all ??? how? how ? how ?

The end, i still cherish the relationship and trying hard to feel for you guys and make you all happy, but each day pass, i am getting more tired and i am getting more self-centered, because you guys are selffish and only think for yourself or people that you all think worth to ? so i am an asshole that don contribute and lousy person to your life ? fine bye , bye don't be hypocrite infront of me and haha any help, i would think twice and see if i should.

2007-12-22T03:02:00.000-08:00

Alright , went for HPt wanted to leave on the third day for cypher bbq, but was held with one task to plan the Nyctophobia in the night , sorry that i can't attend the bbq , really sorry. erm, forget what i did the pervious day before camp le.

so the first day of camp, was late cos really overslept:)ran over to schooling, look around , walk around chat around then was promoted to the so called senior grads with 2 strip on the shirt. went over to have the hpt philosophy then followed by our mentoring session. at this point in time finally i can understand the mentoring more clearly while in the past i don't even understand a single thing. then it comes the lunch finally !, was darn hungry !!
after that was the rope keeping session and the belay school, where i found out that we really need to refresh what we have learn, all's rusty ! wei quan corrected some of the mistake. sijie great you accepted your mistakes !! and change to the better one ! great you've grow lots !

after which dinner and then cheering module, winnie hosted, joanna came back, :) she is so pretty , what a big change ! then was again chatting with chun fu first and talking about problems and things happening , then clement joined in so we bought up some issues and talked about my problem that people don't respect and now it snowballs to other areas , such as my confident level to lead.. after supper and refresh for belay school for grads, went home to sleep and did some work. and why i went home was really that i still feel so weird staying in hpt anymore, sad . my passion is there but the team work and togetherness of the grads are not there. and i seriously still feel so lonely and away from my "friends", everyone's changing ! so much and my relationship with them is changing too. i cherish you guys , i swear i love you guys ! when i don 't contact you guys, dosen't mean i forget you guys or take you guys for granted and don't care.My life is hectic and working so hard to get through everything. finally comes the christmas period , i am not working !at all cos i want some rest and catch up with my friends, we've been through so many things together ! really you guys are part of my life. and it's an important part !

so the second day went to trim or can say that cut my messy hair, then bought coke , one carton which is so heavy and went back to school. so after which ate the dinner and pei wei quan to the mac at the garden , so he had his breakfast and we chatted. went over for tree of excellence and saw things going well and venessa came, an old friend:) tuition partner. went back to school, had camp fire module, happy session then debrief, wanted to go home but wishh to give myself this last chance to see if i still belongs here. stay and can't sleep through the night, so chatted with wq , eve and phebe. suddenly winnie came over and said please go out and talk if you want , others wants to sleep. i don't know why although it's all of of us that is chatting but i just feel that eevrything is my fault, haiz i am getting this phobia of helping myself to voice out, i'll just give in.
i am so lack of confident to do things for myself anymore. from all the incident in life. adventure camp 2007, love 2007 and so many many small small things.

so many things, and third day, nyctophobia, seems like no one understands me and or even try to understand me anymore. i will continue again , need some sleep at this point , not thinking and phasing my sentence correctly anymore.

2007-12-10T23:01:00.000-08:00

My EQ level has drop, i have become less sensative to how people feels. is this good or bad? i shall discuss tonight !

2007-12-10T07:47:00.000-08:00

Yay, i don't girls to survive but if i can have one, a sweet looking, smart and romantic girl is all i need:) so this 7th to 24th, would not be my love weeks :) unless i really found my love in this weeks.

time to upload some pictures of my life:)

2007-12-09T08:49:00.000-08:00

Okayed, last Friday I went for cypher interview for the student leaders, and I was one of the interviewers and most of them said that I am fierce, it's time to move on to be serious in life. we had meeting after the interview, i actually feel that people are weird. they know that they are coming for interview but did not get ready of what they would be asked, gave me stupid answers. !!! After which went for meeting , alright i guess the camp had to be improve lots more and i don't think it would catch on the timing. i won't help unless you guys ask for, you guys need to learn from the hard lessons too.

Then went bugis to look for great friends because of sean's birthday ! but wth they went off to gaylang ! without informing me, but nvm , i still love you guys ! After that since i am not meeting great friends , i get to meet yong jie earlier so we went for club at zouk, a fashion show by Flash imp most of the apparels brough up were not that updated. like skinnies and etc... and now then i realise that lyyod the winner of the hey gorgeous champion is yong jie 's brother....lolx. so chatted with this long time friend was a good night , after which went back to have some fun , was at zouk dancing but idon't like the songs there and the people.. lol so went over to phuture to look for shirley, then dance around but wth , so cramp la !! no place to dance , kana squeeze here and there, lol then saw teng long, huang yong and his gang la.lol erm alright clubs are indeed dirty.lolx
Saturday, slept at 5 am and wake up at 7 :( sad went over to ford, daddy fetch me over to queensway Ford show room ate BK wit fabian thEN went for work. saw medy , whoot she is very good :) meet our partner Aimin, so chat around and work . Quite slack anw , just sit there enter some data, then chat chat and write write , lolx simply to coordinate the test drive for the customers. after work went over to amk with fabian to meet kelly then went sumo house to eat , after which bian and kelly went movie and i was too tired, so went home, online for 10mins on the sofa, wahah i fall asleep . half way of my sleep i wake up and my leg cramp !!! wth damn painful experience and it last for 10mins. after that went back to sleep.

Sunday ford. test drive, this comes the fun day , i was very awake so went around , ate bk for breakfast cause it's nice , lunch took subway , haha and there was this sale girl , me and aimin was thinking how old is she and bet for a free lunch , but don't dare to ask , just know that she is around 30s aimin guess around 29 and me around 33, :) don't judge a book by a cover:) as she make up and looks young do not means she is young. this comes the exciting part , i'm the coordinator so i know when the people will come down to get the car , i on the engine and started playing with it !! I drove the latest car in Ford which is power, the 7 sitter’s-max and the mondeos!! Ha-ha learnt how to park and every thing. I’m potential in driving. : P after which decided to go shopping! So I brought this pants which is really stupid la! Sad damn colorful and looks like a boxer, I wore it to school and it looks funny, whoa! Don’t care, I like it Okayed le, finally my photos are upped,

2007-12-05T11:12:00.000-08:00

Went to school on my daddy's bike, thinking about the Cars again! remembering car plates ! reached school , facing new challenage ! thanks daddy for fetching me almost every morning ! i'm lazy i admit ! sorry to trouble you !

After school went off with rulan , raziah, JJ, karen,elson and myself, took bus as it was raining and ..... 6 of us squeezed at the most back seats, but it's nice to feel warm and also the bond within us.

5th dec 2007 officially saying byebye to our danny big boy ! went to watch the last movie with him before him getting fitter in army. golden compass , the relationships touched me, the king of the polar bears, my fav character in the show i feels.

After so many months, and years, 7th of the last month still comes back and it's really near, how am i going to spend this 7th this year, god will show me.

at this moment, flash back to 3 years ago, everything started so fast and ended so fast like a dream. the things we've done, the dreams that we've have made true. The things and space that is still in my house, i'm thinking about you right now. I hate you ! u stole my Consciences, my pride, my love life! Being stupid and tell myself if ever i have a chance to get you back , i will ! putting down my pride telling my friends that i still love you !, destroying my love life day by day, waiting for a love that will never come back.

3 years ago, i Said my heart is yours. 2 years ago i asked you if you still want my heart. one year ago, i'm dreaming about you and me holding each other's hand, walking down the snowing city in Chitose.
And this year i try so hard to forget you but i got hurt more! and now 7th dec is near , that stupid feelings came back, it's as strong as 3 years ago! No!, this time i want a new love life !!

Bare with me, i need to find my courage to love again. Support me.

2007-12-05T00:31:00.001-08:00

last ... forget when, went to sentosa with andrew , and alot more people, played volleyball and watched rugby volleyball and floor ball competitions. haha played beach volleyball and had fun and i really like that feelings when i can release what ever stress i have, and also the fun level that can reach for me.

On 1st dec went to had a welfare with danny as he is going army soon ! big boy le !:P So we went to THE ONE. i sang some song and told quan man ! HEY i had never try how a drunken men feel like !! so today i will try !!! HELP ME AND take care of me later whe i am drunk ! And indeed i am drunk ! and haha my alcohol management level was not that good:) anw , i got drunk so fast within an hour and it is because i ate the top shell which is damn !! spicy !!!. hence i took the alcohol as plain water and drink and drink and drink !! haha

I vomitted like an idiot and can't even walk proberly ! haha DRUNKEN PIN WEN !! so after which kelly send me home and i bump onto my bed and fall asleep ! the next day i wake up !! WTH hang over !! headache and damn !! headache !

4th dec , went to ps to have a treat from andrew because of some reason !,!! pay ! haha we went cafe cartel ! and had my desire st.louis pork ribs, while jie rui had the dory fish, lian xin with crispy pork chop, wen jie have the sirlon steak while me and andrew had st.louis pork ribs which is hugE !! hahaa damn full after eating everything ! because the girl pass around the food ! and we had to eat more. !!

after which went and walk around and spotlight seriously have many many things!! lolx. So random !

7th DEC !! is coming ! What would happen this year?? !! i 'm awaiting !

2007-12-04T18:51:00.000-08:00

2007-11-28T09:46:00.000-08:00

Sadly to say i seriously got no time to update and i guess no ones check on this blog, but it's okie.
it's for myself but not others.
TO love myself before others.

4weeks after my holidays , i am so busy with school works ,and my jobs.
seriously don need what to say . hard to trust people.

2007-10-28T10:48:00.000-07:00

I'm seriously busy everyday, working , meeting up with friends, take care daddy. be prepare for camp. i'm so scare now, after 4 more hours, i'll be going camp and i am packing now :( anw hope it will be a success, although 3 days is not long but it makes a diference in people's life, i'll do my best.

Friday went to cypher camp. , lili, dota, saturday, kai le house, kellyhouse, nicholas, work, officially paid to look at girls.. lolx. Andree's birthday , saw Ruru, taiwan, sunday , nick is late, . release early, went eat with the girls. then home to sleep, eat with daddy and now packing bag,

all short cut, come back got time then blog !!:P

Friends don't miss if yes, tag more !! haha

back at thursday . monday , left home.

2007-10-22T12:22:00.000-07:00

I guess i'm wrong this time, but i'll not say a single sorry. it's pointless. people would just take this sorry as a joke i planned to make everyone laugh.

when i'm in hpt, i'm just a lousy grads that no one respects. When i'm seriously contributing , humans thinks that i'm weird. when i am lost, no one even care to help me out. My effort going back camp almost everyday after school, while holding the duty to take care of my daddy and looking for source for survivors all went into the drain. This is the first time i felt so demoralised and lost in a camp. I had never feel like this before. I don know where i'm standing to scold the students, because you guys don't even respect me , how am i going to gain respects from students, maybe for this i should be the one scolded by the students. On top of that , i was lectured when i'm trying to help and having my precious meal. I'm so pissed at that poitn of time , but i felt like crying , the words come straight in my face. It's so hurt to be losing face infront of so many people, to protect and help myself, i can't control anymore.

I'm alone most of the time without anyone sideing me or protecting, hence i need o protect myself. It hurts to see people having happy families and having fun while i felt so lonely.

I'll stopped here.
what i want to say.
God, Hope this group of people will contiuned to be happy and safe.

I'll live my life with less happiness.
Our memories has gone into the history lanes.
Hpt will never sense my presences anymore.

2007-10-20T12:55:00.000-07:00

Alright , blogging time. Now i have more phobia of girls. They have mood swings and changed so fast. Please control. everyone is stress and everyone is pissed. Don't thinkk that i am good and throw all your angers on me. I don't accept. Life's busy. LAst week monday, 15oct. Camp started and i decided to Pon cause i am not sure if this is the last camp for ... so i must not miss this event.

On monday we had water activity as tuesday we will not have any KI "kayaking instructor" so was playing around and the feeling is totally different from using a T1. first group that came was fine but second group make me damn angry and pissed !!... please , i know you are good but please don't over take people's positions , you have lot more to learn. i may not be very good but i have see more things than you. i can always lose you as a friend to let you learn. went into water, with second group. paddled around and came to a place to play some game on the kayaks. What, paddles all around the water and i was around to retrive it. It's not a funny matter. So decided to make them own me 50 push up which i don't really like people to be doing push ups. " the meaning behind it. when you lose your paddles when you are having fun , so when you are taking groups and having fun , one member go missing, you don't care? till you need that person to have full attandences?

On tuesday,morning went out to place all the rafting equipments at the specific location , i heard that it was all taken away by a uncle but lucky shannon manage to retrive it. had my Ut and went home to rest.

and wednesday my dad was discharged. i did not went to school
I went back to camp with wen jie.went to cck to take cab and in lot 1 i saw sister, kelly. reached camp side , rest awhile and had dinner. had night walk and was like Omg , we walked into a military when they are having trainings . the tanks are Huge and nice !! The officers are around to guard their training grounds so we contiuned our night walk while not disturbing their trainings.then the MRS , yanyi and chun kit was so stressed up for their camp fire, i wanted to help but some hwo i feel that i am not that good and seriously my confident level is going down because of all you guys !!! so decided to ask chun fu , or wen jie to help . After which Chun fu had the debrief with them , jia you ! you are "AT" now , i know you need ot care about what people thinks but also have that courage to do what is right.

On thursday went out in the morning for science UT and school after presenting , my faci allow me to leave, but i remember i am waiting for wilson so i decided to stay in class to wait. WTH in the end zhang mei and wilson both pang seh me ???? i waited so long and i was like a fucking fool going into camp so late and alone. NvM this only teach me something , don't ever trust anyone for own benefits are more important. went back and have dinner then prepared camp fire, i suddenly just feel that i am in the wrong place and everything is wrong for me , i shouldn't be going back to camp. i am a wondering ghost and everyone seems to see me as invi till they need me . and while having dinner , i am serious pissed la ! thats why i throw out everything that i have been storing. firstly i apologies for that sudden cut off of the conversation of you and students, now i will say why am i so angry . When having training camps, i helped abit in logs and see how you guys are doing, i know la i only have been once a logs, the rest have more experience , but somehow i still remember some of the things that we need to do as logs. i helped but some how you just aiya.... aiya.... heck cared, even moving the tables, come on la !!! it's shannon and not me alright i don't need to ren all your anger and please learn how to manage your angers and emotions. Shannon is the one making you angry so when i try to help and giving some comments , don't come and give me a bad face. when i am angry with someone else do i give you black face? then comes to either lunch or dinner i forget , when i asked if there is anythign not done, you again aiya.. like i am joking and not helping and you think i am nagging at you. come on la i see you as my friend then i decides to ask you those questions la , if you are someone else , i will go enjoy myself instead of going to the canteen to help...you walk off and lucky vanessa stayed to listen , do you know how i feel? it looks like i am a fucking lousy grads that no one wants to listens to. i know you guys are stress la, having so many things to do. but please ... control and work things out instead of complaining about anything. and from this lesson again i learn something ,Don't be KPO even it's friends, wait till they need help then they will seek help from you . and after you helped , don't KPO go and help the other things.

Suddenly i just realise why so many people are not going back HPT , simple , they don't get their repects and when they go back to contribute, no one appreciate only those that are doing great jobs and big things are appreciated. small small things counts alright . i guess i seriously don't feel like going back to HPt anymore. Although i love it and so memories are form there but sme how i am not appreciated. ='(

Friday went back to school study culture and talked about Mean Words, Exclusion, & Divisions, like how people actually Discriminate another. after which went to wait for Andrew to watch and support their floorball match. girls>> RP lost to Nyp, guys >> NYp Lost to Rp. .... 5-3 and andrew got red card for banging the board. ... lame .. lolx i was the target that they throw temper on again cos i'm from rp, lolx alright at least they are joking , they smiled... tat was good , cos he didn't complain all the way but also asked for comments on what he had done wrong and how he can improve, that was omg , great abd good. sometimes people outside are just better than Hpt in terms of thinkings. i think Hpt people need to grow up with their thinkings. don't grow only when there is a camp or what but in daily life , learn what are the correct values.

so today, saturday i wake up at 5 plus and went out to buy dinner for daddy and bet on soccer, small bet la, to support my favourite team MAN U !!! then went home changed and meet wee seng and nick to go meet the rest of the great friends , saw billy at esplande, our friendship had drifted... but i still feel that it's worth it cause that guy are not worth to be forgived. then went home after that. just finish playing dota so decided to blog. 12 min, MAN U ...lost 1-0 to aston i feel so sad but haha in the end won 4-1 !! alright , end here. sleeping .

4.49 am . sign off, good nites :)
take care friends.

2007-10-13T12:32:00.000-07:00

WEt chickens z!! whahaha FUN !!!! great !!

LOxl, these are the show girls, the models ! whaha hot right. but i'm not attracted lehz.:P

LIZ , ASHLEY AND ME , hahah

haha, ALL FUNNY LOOKS . DAMN FUN!

ARhhgg,, i look so white , need to tan up soon !! sucks to look white , lolx

Lolx, alright start from

Wednesday 10th oct 2007 !~! hahaa And special request FROM XUAN WEI ! lolx that i will start having paragragh cos too wordy le :) Sorry la ! wahha my english not that good ! and essay need to paragragh also gave back to secondary school teacher already ! wahaha.

Anw, wednesday, went to school , wahah i love my classmates so much , they are there to support me ,! :) aw, cant forget to say thanks to rulan ! whaha she will prepare tissue for me every morning if i am same group as her , and ! ha she wrote me a word document to cheer me up, indeed it helped me !! waahah. cant forget , the other classmates, ahmad, ahziem , and everyone else , i love you guys !. erm had my enterprise lesson. wahaha , i lefted early cos i have work so asked faci for approver so she of cos approve la ! i so cute lolx. BHB !! whaha after which asked about my Rj that i cant summit by 12, so ask her if i can summit after that anot, alright again she approve !:) so wrote a very personal RJ , my assets and liabilities so , lolx i have more than $1000 of debt not including the laptop ! $ 2000 , haha alright , don't worry things are getting fine and i moving towards success ! wahaha those friends that's not willing to stand by me and help , whahaha bye ! you go. After which went to work , at marina mandarin, then listen to some briefing by ashley then went to eat.

Wah kao , damn suay , when was going to eat , i choosed LJS, long john sliver , but joo tat wanted to eat KFC so went over and show , !!! the SUCKS couple ! and so i told them , i am not going to eat here. so they were like okie lor. but !@ whaha i changed my decision so i stayed !! Don't care them . they are just simple some stupid people in my life. so after which went back to work.

Me, Riley, Andrew and Tat and Yu guang are machines !! haha Packed 1000 goodie bags for canons customers ! whaha it's tired, but fun ! then went home , rushed for last train, went home and sleep at 3 plus , stupid la ! but cos i studied for my UT , so 6+ went out reach school at 8++ , lolx and rested , play Cs with jia jun's lappy, took my Ut and meet up with the bastard which i really don't want and took cab to work. so , Andrew , Joo tat , Riley and Yu guang was in-charge ,me and bastard is not cos we cant reach on time cos of our UT.

Nvm so we started do SAI KANG !! wahaha , pick up some rubbish and walk around chat chat with friends and show girls... anw , The bastard is just flirt la, even with GF !~!! I was send to guard lOLx the back where everyone ate their food la. stupid enough , Chew lian, the ah lian lolx jk la, one of the show girl bullied me and ask me pour drinks for her , and must hold the drink for her ,lolx i do so la, cos she is the only one that can entertain me. lolx the rest not as joker as me ma. At nights, lolx every had walkie talkie , so we started playing with it. lolx OPerations . 1 , OYSTEr, don know hwo to spell la !! wahha we wanted to eat the buffet oyster but cant cos many ppl looking and some one cleared away !! wah !!! arghhh.lolx anw , we went home la ,after sometime.

It comes to last day of program, friday !!. WAhaha the high light of the 2 days. we were all given walkie talkie and with that walkie talkie , i ask all the KA kia , lolx to help me when i need to carry something or pack some thing , so what i did is to use my brain , wahaha. anw, every one was choosing which show is pretty , mine is belinda la !!, but she 23 ! damn so old ! whaha . anw saw this resigntration de girl , was not bad, la , although not very pretty but she .lolx dian me sia. but in the end i say le , i won't take any steps to know you, so you have to take that !! lolx first step :) Not fated, nvm , anw, Wah kao pack goodie bags through out 3 days and today have to pack agian !! Anw , never mind this time is with KA KIAS !! haahaha so was damn slack la.lolx anw , good to follow procon , get to see those damn rish ppl and see how they behave... HOW lian only !lolx. some la, can't stigma this entire group of ppl , lolx, stigma, a new word. ! maybe i used wrongly ,

lolx at night , wah kao !! this part is really !! damn it , A customer cant drink that much and drink THAT much and drank like a dead person , cant even move, or maybe he has fallen asleep, lolx and he is A fat ass !!! needed 4 people to carry him up, joo tat, Yu guang, me and andrew ! Melvin , !!!! and Riley didn't help cos that guy is vommiting and damn smelly and diguesting, from this we can see , that thay are not willing to go through things together. anw, that guy is super heavy !! i tell you !! lolx i was holding his back to let him sit striaght but too tired so pass over to Joo tat and i was holding the head, even head is so heavy !! fuck !lolx then at one point of time , cos Yu guang was holding the plastic bag for his thrown outs. ! lolx vommit de things.lolx and !!! Yu guang tot he is not vomminting anymore so he put down the bag and !!!!!! suddenly he thrown !!! i was scared like shit coming out !! hahaha his head is direactly infront of my private part SO OBSEnce !lolx!! lolx !! alright and lucky Yu guang is fast enough to get the bag up in time or i am going to fuck Yu guang upside down !! wahaha after which , the canon company decided to take on their account and book a room for him ! damn lucky la he !! the place is damn nice, lolx so after which !, last part ! haha anw HAHAA Andrew is damn pissed off by melvin.lolx the bastard as i say . even ..........._______ haha not going to say who, also say that you are so bad, ! haha and agreed with me , what else you want to say to cover yourself?

Went to the garden of marina mandarin and rest and ate foods from buffet and what !! lolx, i was carried up and thrown into the swimming pool ! wah kao !! lucky this time i clever ask them to take out my phone first !, wah memories flash back, my K800i ericsson spoiled because of my Sem 1 classmate puching me into the pool with the phone , loxl why i'm the vitim always... lolx never , was fun after which , everyone 's thrown down include LIZ and Ashley , our boss ! whahaa was so fun , but mandie and Eugenia was not thrown down .lolx they not so close with us la and so fierce la, the eugenia, actually quite attractive but she too naggy and looks are fierce, haha all guys ran away.lolx anw, now Ashley's talking to me And lolx, ask all the boys to add her and liz in msn and friendster, one of the reason , cos Can find all the girls that we are intrested ! lolx , GOOD !! lolx then i show the pics la , don want to type liao ,fingers are tired. loxl !

Bye , procon is good and fun ! events pls call us . !! haha take care guys !! all my friends , i love you all !! wahhaa.

2007-10-09T13:00:00.000-07:00

Sunday, can't sleep so actually talked to Hui xin till morning and went to have breakfast with her at CWP mac. went to school and started lessons. Was damn tired, but can't sleep have to at least help the group abit so do so much research.... BUT !! FUCk !! the first time that i am angry with my team mates !! i gave her everything but soem how she presented everything by herself and covered the whole , entire presentation herself without even giving us some chance to talk !! fuck !!! i 'm seriously first timed so pissed off. so i stood there without saying anything , even my slides i gave it to someone else. And for that fucking first time that i am complaining in my RJ !After which , went straight home and seriously wanted to visit my dad, but sorry daddy , too tired le, so fell asleep at home. the, tuesday did not go school. went to help daddy pay road tax, $37, after which went to visit daddy. before that meet up with lian xin and andrew, haiz, i suddenly feel that i don't want to ask help from them anymore. after which went to town to walk walk alone , then called billy , Woot , and went K-box with him and Ruth, then saw regina !! working at K-box.. lolx. so manage to get special previllage that we could sing till 3am, the k-box close. Bought cake, and gave billy a lousy and small surprise , but hope you like it, it's your birthday, no matter how much i'll need to spend, i'll. you helped me so much when i needed that help. you are there, my brother. ! but for what ur third wish is, sorry, i can't help you fullfill it. i know you want me and melvin to be good friends again , sorry i'll still insist that i'll never be friend with a bastard. Promised. Alright , i just feel that si hong is lucky, didn't choose such a boyfriend like me cause eventually if we are together , i'll break up with you , due to such situation taht i'm *uniceffacing , haha maybe you will break up with me first , casue i believe taht you wouldn't want to face this with me . for those that do not know what i am facing now. i will say it here.

Currently my dad is in the hospital , having some major operation, hopefully he is recovering now. My finacial states now is ... sucks. i have only around 50 bucks on my pocket now. my Mrt
concession is upped on 13th oct. My phone bills are coming after me. A lawyer fees of $700 included payments need to be made before 22nd oct . i've just paid my internet bills. Everyday after school, i need visit my daddy, i am not complaining cause he is the only one that i should love. after visiting him , need to rush home to wash cloths , to homework, rj, feed my fish eat. And seriously looking for a job now, and working almost everyday if i could. everyday , i can't sleep worrying if i forget to do anything. Some times i am wandering , is this a learning experience cause god wants me to learn soemthing out of here>? Or is it that i will be in this way forever or did i did something wrong that i should be treat this way ? broken family. Broken love relationships, always get cheated when i'm so loyal to soemone. Am i too naive ? Sorry guys if i am not replying you in Msn or phone cause seriously if you know about my states now, i seriously don't know how nd whats the mood that i should that i will reply.And if you guys are angry with me , go ahead, after knowing about this fucker called melvin, seriously i don't care if you are angry or fuck, cos unless i cherish or you cherish the relationship we have, i'll see you as the next melvin so to keep myself conscience. I don't need you guys to pity cause i 'll solve everything by myself.

seriously to say , i have phobias on girls now. which ever girl that comes into my life. i'll do my part to test what you actually want and promise that , unless you take your steps first or you attracts me, i'll not take the next step to go after you. for friends , if you really treat me as friend like MELVIN. Simple to say, please don't be one of my friends, casue i have nothing for you to cheat on , i don't have money, i don't have car, i don't have girlfriends, i don't have sister or brothers, i don't have anything for you to cheat on. if you want girls, go look for melvin , he has lots of it. well:) fuck off for such friend!

Well, for real friends, take care of your self, after i solve my problems , i will get back to you guys and we shall have fun and enjoy he every moment taht we spend ! :P :)

2007-10-02T23:06:00.000-07:00

Friday, went to school and saw that the siao ? lolx flower and grass the tv show is coming, super lame. then went to class and actually told my class mates about my stories. that day's lesson was about calture where by how people value things. presented and actually wanted to tears out myself and wanted to create that mood fr the class but not confident enough hence, no one cried:). So all of us presented very fast as we wanted to catch the show at 4 at agora stage. Packed our things and went down. Omg , the stage is like Filled with pool of people ! so trey our way into and nearer to the stage cos i cant see anything , lolx short sighted. So after they started and we see, Lolx okie la maybe they not really pretty and handsome but some how !! lol they have talents !!lolx. cat walking is also talent ! LOlx.... alrigth so watched, and saw the winnings, after which they wanted to take photos with ME LU BIN ! so no one dare to approach, so i wave and give them hand signals haha,.and he say ok! wait Lol, i don even know them la...after photo, so went to see my dad. after which meet up with kenneth they all, kelvin, melissa , benedict and shi min , loxl was talking about funny porns. lolx after which went to Zhi yong house for mah jong session , lolx share with tat, lost 8 dollars , notbad la . almost we lost all, heng i won one 5 dai ownself game one.lolx.then tat also got one 4 dai ownself game.lolx so went home sleep. wake up and went to see daddy again. after which went The one with grea friends, !rocks !! damn fun and nice, haha i almost drank la ! cos i ate the top shell , damn spicy ! and i drank the martel and kilkenny like plain water...lolx, wth lor ,.so sang many songs, memories all came back. After all was nice and happy !!:P i love great friends !

2007-10-01T11:31:00.000-07:00

Monday, 1st october, i told myself , no matter what i have to go school but ?? i seriously got no motivations to go to school, =( i've lost all my self and soul. so i went back to sleep, suddenly, macus called me and ask me if i wanna work, since i didn't go to school, i must at least i must do something to make myself filled for the day, i got no time to waste, so i went to work. Sorry macus but i went to buy toto for my dad before i report to work. I have to fullfill everythings he want. afterwhich , reached and started doing things, so many things that they are throwing andwe are like wah, the place is so small , so when they throw the things, and if there are anythings good, i just pick up and keep, macus do that too. And out of sudden, there was this stupid Cockroach which scared everyone including me .... -.- it's so drama when LIZ actually jumped on top of her Chair....Macus tried to catch it, but can't. so i saw a bag and use it and shouted !! Stop running and i caugh hold of it. seriously, i feel bad la.. don't know why.. it's a living thing after all. after work,

Finished at 7.30 and went off to see my daddy, alright i guess he's okie !! i serious hope everything would be fine, i only have him now and i can't afford to lose him. i'll work hard for you daddy. ! don't worry ! saw many NYP students there, please help me take care of him , thanks alot.

Erm after which went back to work again , met muneer and went back office to get things and went to red dots measeum packed some things and sort out name cards, which is ? erm fun playing with the cards? erm after which went home , and andrew came over to play dota for one match then went to eat at coffee shop, sorry if i everytime neevr reply msn, i feel sorry cos i went out, sorry yun fang. ! ya okie , hui xin was talking about this topic, cos i say i can't sleep,

>>> hui xin said, "aiyo, think what. think gf until cannot slp ah." alright ,i replied, i will never have a relationship. :( alright i guess so, i don wan to drag someone down and seriously how would girls come about likely a person like this." :( never mind , when some one that's willing to suffer all this with me , is the right one i'm waiting.

I'm coming up with this idea, to solve my current problem, it's a major one. It affects my life , my future and everything.

I'm feeling so lonely at home :(

Every minutes, i feel like ....

nobody can ever feel this way like i do.

2007-09-29T09:53:00.000-07:00

Alright, wednesday ponned school cos too tired, then after which went for briefing , thats all.

27th september 2007 thursday which i went out with daddy at 7am and took cab there becos was raining, but somehow daddy insisted not to waste but this time i won , so we took cab. after reached , i went to school, and started on my lesson, the class love to be entertain by me :P i love them too. 2nd break went out with Evon , lolx , alright we wanted to find clinic but somehow, all closed for lunch,lolx took cab , go to CWP but !! haha too many people. so we went to buy donuts. haha she gave me a oreo one.. so took bus back to school. then after school went for work, anyway , thats the slackest i ever worked. just sit in the dressing room and look after the place, while .. seeing so many things... i don't meant to see, but... thats my job. lolx. Anyway , the cameras are like all together 50k ?? and i am looking after it, it's stress. lolx after work went to sentosa.. damn tired, pack the lockers till 3 , and took cab home.lolx ate mac for dinner and supper.

28th, the next day wake up at 6.00 and bathe, and i am like wah kao damn tired. slowly slack, lolx , passed 6.15 which we should meet, lolx and what ?? we are late for work for one hour, we reach the hawker at 7.30 and we are still eating , after which took cab to work again. reached at 8, slack awhile and got our briefing, god , my cousin, andrew, bian and tat is working at the snack station , lolx slack la ! i'm the traffic usher , lolx slack also, but 12 plus there is like no carpar anymore so haha need to repeat this sentence for more than 100 times " hi, sir, you need to park 200m down hill and there will be ppl fetching you up."... lol , the whole day is like running here and there with macus, he everytime , pin wen LAi ,come follow me . lolx wah lao then in the end , never ask me do anything, haha but nvm i get to see the whole club, except the goals course. anw, saw this show girl which is like WHAOOO. haha damn nice and pretty, haha actually saw her on the canon show le but never talk, so decided to chat , haah and she is like !! wth , 23 years old, damn old la. i mean for me la.lolx anw, such things are not important to me now. so about 8 plus 9 , andrew, my cousin and tat and bian all lefted, because i need to stay to continue to help. lolx. so 11 plus we ended, and everybody was shaggg... we took group pictures, and it's really nice !! haha after which took cabby home, with guang , billy and one more, lolx forget name, haha. fall asleep at 3 plus . hha oh ya , before leave, lolx was like just as for fun , about stacy and they start to disturb me, so stupid but i manage to find her friendster but she's attached so, no fate and haha seriously i am too busy for that now , unless you are willing to support me instead of giving me problems.everything is stressed, so pressurize.
anw after this 2 days, please la i'm still not ur friend please, an enemy is always the same. don't be naive if i can give off so easily, everyone would just climb over me, i have already said never force me to do things and insist on something , it's something sucks. so get lose and don't waste my time. i have better and lots of othe things to do. i guess ben if you manage to read this post, i'm sorry if you're angry with me or anything that day on the golf thingy, but sad and sorry to say, i don't care , cos really you are too close to him and i feel that sucks feelings, cos i grouped people together and see them , sorry , so i don't care about anything , if you're with someone i just don't like.

29th, went to see daddy and i guess everything's alright but i still have to wait and pray hard !!:(
daddy, i mISS you badly !! Serious, i love you ! , i will do anything for you !!, now i will work hard and get back everything !! I know that i won't get 3 wishes like those show , but what i want is not 3 wishes but is just a hope, i hope everything would be fine. =(

2007-09-25T13:49:00.001-07:00

25th sept Alright , today reached school and started the lesson , so bored and seriously in school and don 't know who i can call to accompany me ,i'm so bored and lonely , haiz. Everything have come so far, and have had happened, what else can i do ? My heart soften each time , i tell myself to insist on things so that people won't step over me ,and promise there will never be forgive and forgot but what ? my heart just feel so soft each time and feel that haiz. everyone's at fault .... and have slowly let things go. I guess that stupid pin wen is back again. after which , kept looking for people to work. good pay. so first break ,remember that xiao tian and carrie are in same class and decieded to askked them for lunch so we met. then went back class, after school chatted with ivy and decided to go town to look at her present. while walking around and eating, told her my stupid stories again, my close friends would know everything or even seen me doing it le. i'll wait for that angel to arrive. you take one step, i'll take two. chatted so much and make me think back to the past and seriously , there are sweet memories and also bad ones, but it's still worth it .but i simply love you.after which send Ivy to PS then i meet chun fu and kai ling and took cab to sembawang waiting to give surprise to wilson. 17th birthday ! happy birthday, may all ur wish come through! after giving him that surprise, they chatted, and i just simply fall asleep on the bed, i'm too tired, thanks ivy for that rj ! Everyday going school alone, having 2 break out alone , and after school go home alone ,seriously it feels bad. 27th. haiz it's going to be more lonely for me , it's empty right here, haiz haiz haiz. i really have the urge to quit school now. so many things that are stacking up on my head. Motivations are just a simple thing that i want. but some how , i'm not getting from anyplace. kai ling i'm sorry , i know that my heart is jumping everywhere to look for that love, but i feels that you undertand best, my family, i am so lonely, i really just simply wants to find a partner taht can share all the joys and things with me. ya but i'll control myself ,sorry. i'll not try to find that love now. waiting .
All the pressure is on me, whose willing to share this load with me ?
I need to cope with so many things, whose willing to be that motivation for me ?

Simple life.

2007-09-25T13:26:00.000-07:00

Alright , last saturday , simple and nice , went for meeting , HPT, no matter what i wont give you up cos you are once my life saviour. no matter how , or everybody that have abandant you , i will be there till ur last day !! so went for meeting, everybody was like , WAH pin wen !! haah cos i long time never go back le. after which meet awhile , and went over to eat our dinner before we contiunes our meeting. wanted western food for 608 but too many people till we must wait 1 hr... lame of cos we wont eat cos we need to plan later, so we went 631 for western food too, it's nice too. after which went over to shannon's house and start our meeting , whao saw fire work, cos AMK offiical opening i guess. after which went home i guess. lolx

Alright sunday, wae up at 12 then went for bak ku teh with my family, it's damn nice la the bak ku teh there, have chance , i 'll let my parents see an extra chair at the bak ku teh ,lolx , my partner , auntie ! wait , i 'll find one ! lol after which went to novena to see beach volleyball competition, 4 vs 4, saw so many match and lian xin they all got in 1st runner up , sad. but you all have try ur best ! jia you !! after which went to Joice's house warming , alright , the house is really , damn nice okie !! haha 5 level , basement is car park so so on, we went to the computer room and start our chat chit and 3 gu 6 bo , haha talking about rp then the siao hua siao chou . lolx keep laughing and laugh ing like mad. lolx after that went home. and asked chun fu to sign up for the shoe competition.

i'm looking at my future, i'm afraid, i don have anythign right now ! and seriously i am seriously not working hard enough to achieve my goals, i am like the rabbit that is waiting for things to happen. NO , i promise my self that i must earn so much and let my dad have a good life and seriously i feel that $$ is one of the factor to have happiness in the society now , you don need to have much money but at least you must have enough for you to do thinsg that you like. like car , bike , all this basic transport , wait for me , lolx and Ivy OH !! lolx , you are not wrong to choose one with transport, i suddenly feel that it's good to have one , lolx. just that don loo at a person's wealth can le.

2007-09-21T11:44:00.000-07:00

Alright on 18th september, went out with kailing, chun fu and Fishy , haha went to buy donut, i bought 6 for andrew and lian xin. Then after which went into super market to buy some drinks, and i bought Sushi ! haha , then i decided to go to the bridge , to slack and enjoy ourselves there, so we went up and they were saying that why must we come here and eat sushi with sand and dust ,lol but it's the environment that matter, it's romantic up there !!:) haha alright the next time i will go up there with my sweet sweet Love. :P After which we chatted about Hpt, and so many things have happened, Endure HPT i'll do my best for you. erm went to Century sqaure and sat out side by the door at the water.... something la. then we play with water, haha and took photos.

2007-09-17T08:42:00.000-07:00

Alright, On 16th september, sunday , haha went for family breakfast at a chinese Restaurant, the food is like so much till i feel like vomiting when i see it, but not bad after all , the food. Afterwhich went to meet andrew at kallang, sorry for that long wait:) haha then went to work with chen xu and yong ann and his friends. haha carry table, chairs and many many things:) weight training LOlx, Alright we are having fun while working and while having some mucles building :) ?Oh ya before that , go to buy 4D , alright asked CHen xu to choose 4 numbers, and what , lol the number appear, consolation prize, alright thats lucky. lolx although it's not much money but i have to still treat him. After work , our boss fetch us to tao payoh, in the front , which is me and andrew and the boss, we chatted and some much things that the boss is actually working on and also he say, everything you must try ! then you will have more knowledge, anw thats quite true. dare to try, success is near. True. after which , ate KFC , and accompany andrew home and took cab to lian xin's place and i went home.

On 17th, the first day of sem 2 , i wake up at 7 and seriousy don know if school starts at 8.30 or 9 so msg some friends, lolx and they all say 9 so i went back to sleep , wake up at 7.30 lolx, and get ready, went to school , haha feel so fresh and got into the class, haha OMG damn feeling weird, haha was so quite , after 2nd break then i started talking , my group contains, Me , ahziem, elson , debra and pearly, lolx alright our work finished and i find that the PPT slides done by debra was rather nice :) the words are nice. after which , went for cypher for some shooting , lolx damn cute la haha adrain and felicia. we were shooting something for Mr and Miss SIt , haha you guys will see it soon. After which went home.

2007-09-15T13:13:00.000-07:00

On 14th of september, went to collect a phone that my daddy won , that phone is not bad, i think is Ericsson de walkman phone, alright. so i didn't want to wake up because i'm tired but decided to follow my daddy to collect that phone cos he don't know where is it and it's at tampines, a place i use to go. so i wake up and get ready and made a call to check where is the place, and it's actually at the big IKEA by the high way, so we went and The place was like !! wah kao ! It's big, one day i gonna go there with friends, i guess it'll be fun !:) so we went up and take BUT !! omG , sorry daddy !! haha i saw the date wrongly and it is suppose to be on tuesday then can take.lol NOT by tuesday must taKE.lolx. After that we daddy say it's alright so he fetch me back to market to meet my brothers, alright , last time my dad use to nagg at me when he see ppl smoking around me, but now he know that i'm old enough to take care on myself, A simple " Pin Wen zhao dian hui lai. Xiao xin" and he went off. seriously i LOVE you, i am willing to go through any stage of life together , no matter happy and sad , you have me and i have you ! :) after which ,saw my sesame cut off his hair to number 1 , haha YOU are old enough le , going into army le !! better jia you in life !!:) then i ask them to go town , so everyone went home to change . after then meet up. so we went to far east to walk walk , and saw so many things to shop. then went to eat. after which !! hahaa Lao di fang, Cappage !! :)play Snooker with strengers:) and we won both match, we played a 2 vs 2. me and quan man . then see them play dota and i'm not playing cos i think i'm lousy so just watch lor, they play with terence they all, and i fall asleep halfway.:) we won la. terence they all lose. then we went express eat and went home. People may think my life is so childish or boring but what matters is the people that is around , they made my life meaningful. great friends, hpt ,5 agape ,my family ,i always leave you people and when i fall down and can't stand up again , you guys are always there to support me, how am i going to repay ?? simply, i'll be a good man and make everyone around me happy .

ON 15th , saturday, went to S11 to eat with daddy, then went out with andrew and lian xin to town, shopped,went to eat at first then saw.....it's weird and i seriously feel very weird and..... so i decided to go off from there and walk around first then andrew and lian xin faster finish their food and come accompany me, Finally !!! i bought something for myself, a NUM slipper. Seriously i have long not buying anything for myself but always when i have money, i would buy things for my friends and my love ones making them happy. Now seriously i understand , i made everyone happy !! but ?? in the end , i'm the one sad. some times i tell myself it's alright this is secondary but they are important. my heart is still not fixed, i am still feeling sad. when i gave my love out, there's no return all the time, must i listen to my friends??? they told me that love is a game , you must play with it, and also you are not that lousy. LOlx, wTH , love is a game??? i still don't like to believe this. i am not going to play any games, to make people fall in love with me. I'll wait , and i believe the right one will come one day. i'll just wait and not do anything , cos i believe if you are the one, you'll take the first step then i will take the 2nd and 3rd step. afterwhich , recheal came and went to bought a V -neck shirt for his BF, so i tried the shirt and it looks nice. then leave town at 9 , because i wanted to go home and change then go club with my rp mates. so went off , then andrew and lian xin and recheal ask me not to leave but accompany them to k pool so i went , after which took cab but ............ alright half way, i decided not to go , cos someone is going, i have nothing to say but i'm seriously pissed off, when his going , no one informed me. alright have fun alright, i guess you guys don't even care for my feelings at all. since that. i have nothing to say. but i'm sad. i spend that money going half way and went home, i sudddenly feel that i'm really stupid , why don't listen to andrew and lian xin , not to go. because i tell myself, i don't want to miss out anything , and i feel that you people are part of my life going club for twice , how much have we gone through? and also i feeel that i don't want to PS you guys, but ???? have you guys though for me ? if you guys don know that he is going, at least when you all see him , tell me , i wont spend that stupid money going half way and turn back. PISSED. STUPID ENOUGH !! PISSED enough. I'll show my attitude soon. how can i be a good man , after so many things happen ??. so went home and changed, and went back to find andrew and lian xin. we actually discuss about why is my taste so weird, but i feel that, it's the feeling that is important but not that lookings and anythign else, and i always feel that i don't have the standard to go after pretty and good girls. i am standing no where. and i feel that the pretty it is , it leaves me faster. :( It's alright , now what i am doing is right, waiting and mean while, work more and earn money to make myself happpy. If you guys cherish this relatonship with me, you all will also want to make me happy and also spend that little time to think for me and my feelings.
Nvm !! :)
take care !
bye.

2007-09-13T12:59:00.000-07:00

This is when we first ton out at the bridge, it's memorable but everyone have to still move on and things changed.. from the past.

Yeah, thats right :) i'm enjoying so much !!!:) Erm , went sentosa with Andrew and lian xin. and also mark, zhi yong, his gf and friends. We played beach volleyball and the sun is indeed hot , lolx And also we have 2 good friend, One is from mediacorp, channel U ba i guess, The ah Ben , lolx and his friend, we played 4 on 4 , Wah kao , ah ben's hair is ,lol damn interesting and through out the whole game i am wondering if he would be very very hot , cos is those bao zha tou !! hahaha BOMB !!! :) and the hair looks so thick and hot la. lol .we Had real fun and also Sweat so much !! Ben was friendly:) and abit lame ..lolx after that we went wash up, during wash up, so lame again , zhi yong asked for shampoo, so andrew threw the shampoo out and the whole case broked and all the shampoo came out. After that then we went vivo , walked. Oh ya ~! in the tram , i saw this girl , the feature damn nice and pretty. Lolx, just say only cos look very special.:) after which went to PS alone to walk around , actually suppose to wait for shiaw ting, Tong li dan they all one. After that ,lolx change meeting place, changed to kovan, so i went to kovan and WTHHH !! change to Hou gang again , so i went to hou gang, but i don see anyone there and i waited for 1 HOUR !!! hahaa and was so hungry, so ate old chang kee and fall asleep out the hou gang mall. then they finally arrived, then we went to cafe Cartel for dinner and chatted, quite fun and interesting life stories:)... Always moved on !! , HAPPY BIRTHDAY TONG !!, take care ar ! :) really hope to see you all soon again !:)

2007-09-11T13:56:00.000-07:00

Thanks arsaf:P

Oh !! alright sis !! , christin, haha everything seems to be so right and true :)

i'll take this as a camp that i have planned, and now debrief. haha i should have look into her character properly and understand about her past, for refrence. And also i should have not give in some much for her but leave some pride for myself. thats stupid , once and for last time i am doing it. and also i should long ago listen to my friends opinion :).

seriously i suddenly feel that, not i cant get the grapes and i am saying it sour but haha seriously thanks alot.lucky i am not with her , cos now i got so many other chances and also manage to see so many nicer and beautiful girls out there.

character and thinking is very important ,and also my friends and daddy must like her.

this is a stepping stone and a exprience.

Also love is blind but i won't be blind the next time round:) want me to go after you and treat you good ? so you must treat me good and be attractive enough to catch my attentions. :P

2007-09-10T12:26:00.000-07:00

YEs, you're right and clever , i won't forgive you. If a girl is more important, then go for it.

For me , brothers are always more important. In the past, a girl asked me, your brother and i who you trust, i never give back any reply and i leave her. sorry, because if you want me to choose, the answer is brothers. i would always find one that my brothers and her can get along.

today went to half court to play basketball... kana zip. .... wah in my own town and i kana zip, 18 years never happen before. alright tml going down for meeting at 631 the uncles want us to know each other so such things wont happen again....Thanks kenneth and ah hua..for coming down to help thanks so much and sorry to trouble you guys. i'm not going to say much for this incident.

LUCKY, i did not show my anger and hate on those guys just now, i guess i would be lock up now or trying my ways to run out of singapore :) Ren yi shi hai kou tian kong.

I'll move on from here,haha Kai ling !!! i must get a gf that you and CHUN Fu , ANDREW, lian xin and Great friends like one okie !!! haha KAI LING !!! i will de. !!

yayay went out with Yunfang and wanted to blog about it but no time. ya we meet up at city hall and i am on time while she is late for 1/2 and hours !!! arghh haha nvm i waited. then she were like at suntec when i am at city hall. hahaa okie . well blur head ! then after that went to eat , wah i didn't know you vegetarian la ! haha and i kept asking you to try the unagi, sorry huh. after that decided to bring her to the road shore, the bridge la to see something that i have written on the railling. 16thdec, lindee first time went out with me. but it's painted away. so took some picture with that fairy wheel, although the journey is long but i think it's worth it, there is nice views and nice cool atmosphere. It's romantic too huh !! haha. afterwhich went for movie and seriously don't watch apartment , it makes you laugh like hell and also make you feel confuse even at the last scene. RIGHT ??? yun fang?hahah and wah the movie
theatre damn cold la ., lol and anw that jacket is not hers anymore, haha. then after which took bus home :)

2007-09-09T10:58:00.000-07:00

:) thanks so many people :) but seriously that hate, it's hard to neutralise. It's strong than anythign :). yeah. this few days went out with friends, andrew, lian xin, yun fang:) to so many place:) watch movie ,FLy kite, play arcadde, eat good food , everything and of cos i feel better and also i see so many better girl outside and better friends :)

Karma . don't worry those that do so much bad things, one day you will get it all back by yourself.

Anw . people out there, beware if you wants to be friends with me , cos haha i don't have money, i don have anything , but what i have is only my soul and body with you all the time. a loyal friend.

YOU GUYS WATCH OUT !! :)

2007-09-07T12:53:00.000-07:00

:) Thanks christin. Thanks Kai ling. things finally get into my head.
From this incident, i don't lose anything but i gain 2 things, a lesson and a truth.
I am also better prepared for my future.
guys and friends remember this carefully, Once a hypocrite always a hypocrite, try to restand your trust for them. :) don't get cheated.
To find a better girl? yeah a better choice. I'm don't have bad tempers, i don't change my feelings so easily, i am not like both of you, one changed 4 target in 4 months when he can't get. another... haha well you guys know it the best.
i don't know if you guys' heart is being eaten up by dog or monkeys from reserviours or what.
i finally understand why does all your friends leave you in the past and why does ur previous relationship all don't last.
:) smile , haha i learnt so much. seriously. Muneer , you can continue listen to my opinion cos most of the time is correct and now also i have more experience so it would be more real.
Simply to say, since you know when such things happen, you will lose a friend and yet you do it :) haha don't ever regret losing a friend cos nno point, no forgive and forget for me.
Yeah, i don't lose anything but it's you guys that have lose a loyal friend.
In my life , i don have anything, all is about my friends and love, and thats why i am so much towards all this too bad that you guys lose me.

Lets see how long both of you last ba. :)Di3ty C0#ples

2007-09-06T13:13:00.001-07:00

If i say i am not angry, thats something fake, i don want to be a hypocrite like someone. alright. Bastard of the year. or maybe your life time. My blood is boiling every minutes, every seconds. seriously if i could have that chance to kill someone, i will.
You cheat my love, then now my trust, what else both of you wants??? tell me. want my money ?? i know i don have , what else ?? all my friends?/ all take it with you okie. And Fuck OFF. WHAT ELSE YOU FUCKERS WANTS TO CHEAT. TELL ME !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I ONCE SAID ONE OF THE THING THAT CAN REALLY MAKE ME GO MAD is by cheating me, well done, i am fucking warning you people, try touch me , try disturb me, and try talk to me, i promise I'll PROMISE I"ll SLAP YOU ON THE FACE , TO MAKE UR FUCKING BASTARD MASK OFF THE GROUND.

Hey, BAstard use ur brain and think okie?? how have i been treating you okie, since you don like it that nice way as a bro, haha well i'll show you another way. OPpps, sorry , not brother, but same, with 7 words BAStard... Your name is off my life, and is bad listed where ever that i'll be.

Don't think that after some time, i will understand or cool down and talk properly. FAT HOPES !!! I will take this in my heart !!! year 2007. MY HEART...IN MY HEART !!!! WHERE EveR I GO !!

2007-09-06T10:00:00.000-07:00

If you come and read my blog, please seriously !! FUCK Off. DO you think you deserve even that 1% . Come on and use ur brain and think, okie. I've say alot of time, feelings are controlled by yourself, don't come and bullshit okie, go fucking enjoy your relationship fuck off my sight, Work with you in cypher , lets seee how i am going to wwork okie. haha oh well, don't act ke lian and soft in your blog okie. that's gonna make me vomit.

Hey friends of mine out there, Don't get cheated by this guy, i am serious. beware of beast around you, RPians.

2007-09-05T11:14:00.000-07:00

Holding my tempers, people step over my head. FUCKERs trust me, when i get angry, You wouldn't like it !!! NO point explaining much more, every thing is bullshit, now is either me or them, i have stated very clearly, don't try and talk to me, i'm stubborn means I AM STUBBORN !!!

Why do such things happen to me ?? HAHAHAAHAHA, It's DAmn funny and Cute, one of My brother??? is now ATTAched !!!!! WEll hope you 2 live FUCKING happily okie??

BROTHER?? HOW DOES THIS 7 word come into me ? ANSWER: stupidly and i'm too naive.
how am i going to trust my brothers again ? Please answer me =) fuck..

being a good , nice guy is hard but HELping brothers to go after a girl is even harder , hahaha GOod job , keep it up, you have done it.

I really can't believe such things would ever happened, haha what a surprise, nice surprise, you wake me up, thanks so much again. BROTHER !!!!!!!!!!

WELL, i guess i'll let you be the always nice guys infront of everyone. haha and i am not going to go against my image anymore, from my look, people always say i am bad, hahaha yeah you guys are right !!! I AM NOW !!!! FROM THIS point onwards !!!

2007-09-05T11:13:00.000-07:00

Today’s September 2, 2007.
This few days have been working in IT show , on 29th of August , was the first day and I was assigned to this booth called “Lancraft” a Sub booth to sell logictech’s products. Get to know people and actually most of the workers there are also from Rp, that was nice, get to know more friends from my school. When we first reach there and when we are packing and trying to get familiar with the place and the products that we are going to sell, this customer came and gave us a damn hard question , “ Hey, Is this version 2 or 1? “ My partner was ah tat, and Joel. Three of us was like looking at each and seems like questions mark flying around the air and so we decided to run back to main booth and ask so actually that product was a version 2. After that, was looking round the place to see if I can find anything I can buy and see if my neighbours are friendly so actually saw my eye candy for the entire It show, she looks thin but not skinny, she have a special look and her eyes do give out some “Dian”, LOL. Any way, don’t think I’ll be interested, sick of relationships and I got no time for it. Maybe save it for my future. =P The first day was rather tired and hard to pass as there are so many questions and so many things we do not know. After which home sweet home. Oh ya and Shu hui, Shi qing they all are actually working at the booth beside mine, haha what a small world.

On the second day, 30th , the second day heard that Joel was sick, was rather bored of cause when there is least people, the fun would be lesser and also my plan with tat can’t continue is to go for long break together. But never mind had some fun too, targeted 2.5k for sales but we got 3.4k. Oh my god that’s so much more. Great sales men. OH I remember I bought my Hand phone with a girl from M1 and actually I saw her during the show and actually she is staying near to my place, what a coincident. This is actually memorable; Andrew and me when breaks comes, we would bring our food and go to this place which is at the back of the IT show to eat. I have taken some pictures. And also during break I will go down and visit Fabian to see how is his sales, jia you ba , brother , just talk more. You can do it. At night went Yck to eat with Andrew, heard Lian xin twisted her ankle and hand. Do take care and don’t think so much have fun for life. Oh ya and fishy, Beverly, Melvin big and Benedict came to visit me, thanks! At least, you guys make me feel happy and nice at that moment I see you guys.
On the 1st went for work, wake up and actually was Andrew that woke me up because my phone was spoiled and I was using the old one and the time was like one hour slower. Went for work, wanted my dad to see where I am working hence asked him to fetch me there. Reached Suntec and was looking for my breakfast but saw the food republic full of people hence walk around to see if I can buy anything else and wanted to find a Present for Winnie. Saw a necklace but think she wouldn’t like it so did not buy. After that can’t get anything even my breakfast so went for work with a empty stomach, endured awhile and lunch came and I was first to go for break. After that went for breaks with Tat and we actually joined this competition. Chang, me, Andrew and Tat. Alright told Joel to go for break because me and Tat is leaving at 5.30 for that competition held at Intel was rather fun la, working and we still can join competition, a mini one la. But when we arrived at there, our opponent was not there. So we don’t want to wait so we left. Afterall, it’s a fast day, and hitting our sales at 4k plus, it is getting better and better. After work wanted to meet Evon, Shirley they all but guess they are tired and not going anywhere so went to find Winnie they all but somehow I just don’t feel right, they’ve all changed. So much. You guys had choose the way you all wants to grow up and we are not the past anymore, I can’t always be there and my words has become less impact for you guys. But one day you guys feel happy or sad and choose to share with me, I’ll still be there, the same old listening ears waiting all along.

2007-09-03T14:12:00.000-07:00

Today’s September 2, 2007.
This few days have been working in IT show , on 29th of August , was the first day and I was assigned to this booth called “Lancraft” a Sub booth to sell logictech’s products. Get to know people and actually most of the workers there are also from Rp, that was nice, get to know more friends from my school. When we first reach there and when we are packing and trying to get familiar with the place and the products that we are going to sell, this customer came and gave us a damn hard question , “ Hey, Is this version 2 or 1? “ My partner was ah tat, and Joel. Three of us was like looking at each and seems like questions mark flying around the air and so we decided to run back to main booth and ask so actually that product was a version 2. After that, was looking round the place to see if I can find anything I can buy and see if my neighbours are friendly so actually saw my eye candy for the entire It show, she looks thin but not skinny, she have a special look and her eyes do give out some “Dian”, LOL. Any way, don’t think I’ll be interested, sick of relationships and I got no time for it. Maybe save it for my future. =P The first day was rather tired and hard to pass as there are so many questions and so many things we do not know. After which home sweet home. Oh ya and Shu hui, Shi qing they all are actually working at the booth beside mine, haha what a small world.

On the second day, 31st , the second day heard that Joel was sick, was rather bored of cause when there is least people, the fun would be lesser and also my plan with tat can’t continue is to go for long break together. But never mind had some fun too, targeted 2.5k for sales but we got 3.4k. Oh my god that’s so much more. Great sales men. OH I remember I bought my Hand phone with a girl from M1 and actually I saw her during the show and actually she is staying near to my place, what a coincident. This is actually memorable; Andrew and me when breaks comes, we would bring our food and go to this place which is at the back of the IT show to eat. I have taken some pictures. And also during break I will go down and visit Fabian to see how is his sales, jia you ba , brother , just talk more. You can do it. At night went Yck to eat with Andrew, heard Lian xin twisted her ankle and hand. Do take care and don’t think so much have fun for life. Oh ya and fishy, Beverly, Melvin big and Benedict came to visit me, thanks! At least, you guys make me feel happy and nice at that moment I see you guys.

On the 1st went for work, wake up and actually was Andrew that woke me up because my phone was spoiled and I was using the old one and the time was like one hour slower. Went for work, wanted my dad to see where I am working hence asked him to fetch me there. Reached Suntec and was looking for my breakfast but saw the food republic full of people hence walk around to see if I can buy anything else and wanted to find a Present for Winnie. Saw a necklace but think she wouldn’t like it so did not buy. After that can’t get anything even my breakfast so went for work with a empty stomach, endured awhile and lunch came and I was first to go for break. After that went for breaks with Tat and we actually joined this competition. Chang, me, Andrew and Tat. Alright told Joel to go for break because me and Tat is leaving at 5.30 for that competition held at Intel was rather fun la, working and we still can join competition, a mini one la. But when we arrived at there, our opponent was not there. So we don’t want to wait so we left. Afterall, it’s a fast day, and hitting our sales at 4k plus, it is getting better and better. After work wanted to meet Evon, Shirley they all but guess they are tired and not going anywhere so went to find Winnie they all but somehow I just don’t feel right, they’ve all changed. So much. You guys had choose the way you all wants to grow up and we are not the past anymore, I can’t always be there and my words has become less impact for you guys. But one day you guys feel happy or sad and choose to share with me, I’ll still be there, the same old listening ears waiting all along. Anyway, the present, Winnie remember to come and choose or I am not going to buy your present anymore. Erm, I remember small Melvin they all came to visit me, I saw you and wanted to talked to you but somehow I feel weird, everything is over and you are living your life and I am living mine, guess you would find your guy soon. Hope you’ll have happiness and live life without much troubles. A simple love that I have given but a hard felt response I’ve got.

2007-08-25T10:27:00.000-07:00

Haha, now its time to update blog le. Last Wednesday was great, went to school. W26M rocks , went in class , teacher say do what ever you all want.. today don need to do ppt, or anything. then after that he say wanna eat pizza for break fast ?? hahaa he treated us eat , mr ong , you're just great :) then after that played Big 2 dai ti all the way till 12 plus he say who is in rush you can go le. then we were omg. then after that i decided to accompany my teacher till 4pm to play dai ti. hahaha omg thats great , now ,kenneth told me haha about yong ann's class which is same faci as us. After that went to melvin's house play mah jong. thats all :) me billy , kenneth, kelvin and melvin.

Thursday. have gym training wah . vomitted twice during jogging and pull up.. lolx becoming weaker and weaker:( sad i will be back..after that went to eat and went home , having aches everywhere. went to play mah jong again i guess?? forget le

Friday didn't went to training wanted to find job but can't find:(

Saturday got time trail , i wake up late:( haiz sad sad sad....after that meet kenneth they all in amk hub and after which went to eat kfc , then .. lolx went to kenneth house play game . the nites was fun , haha ice cream soda !!! hahaa then now going home, i'm still at his house. lolx, later meeting my brothers for dinner i guess if there is no changes.

=) smile now i finally understand, to love someone is so hard , so i will keep this love with myself, you must be iniative to get it yourself. =) or it will stay with me forever. I guess i may not have the best criatria that a girl wants but i believe that i would be a good bf. !! :) yeah . anw , i gtg , kenneth going pray with bOb:) haha my captain , good luck have fun for those staying at home and viewing people's blog :) Love you guys !! bye .

2007-08-24T08:31:00.000-07:00

List out your top 5 birthday presents wish for:
1. Nice foods.
2. I have almost everything…lolx, for money I’ll earn it myself. =)
3. Many Surprises
4. A happy family with many many Members.(:
5. A Girlfriend that LOVES me(:
Answer the following questions:
1. The person who tag you is? IVY OH :P
2. Your relationship with him/her is: A good friend, having fun whenever we meet each other =)
3. Your 5 impressions of him/her: A) Fun loving. B) Cute C) Slacking all the time D) Lazy!! E) Nice girl =)
4. The most memorable thing he/she had done for you? Allow me to draw on her face :P
5. The most memorable words he/she had said to you? Stupid Pin Wen! =)
6. If he/she becomes your lover, you will? I will of cos treat her how I treat my lovers lor, lolx but slowly wait for this to happen, unlikely to happen =)
7. If he/she becomes your lover, things he/she has to improve on will be? She must love me and Hahaha must be willing to spend more time with me.
8. If he/she becomes your enemy, you will? I’ll never talk to her, look at her, go near her. Unlikely to happen also ba :P
9. If he/she becomes your enemy, the reason will be? Cheat my feelings, haha or hit my head !! I hate that !! haha
10. The most desire thing you want to do for him/her now is? Wah, do what ?? Erm, help her in her studies ?? not to be so lazy and keep ponning school, haha
11. Your overall impression of him/her is? Okay okay lor… haha
12. How do you think people around you will feel about you? Irritating, noisy, full of craps and stupid jokes and haha maybe sucks and oh ya!! Good to take me for granted =)
13. The character you love of yourself is? Noisy, and pessimistic, or else my life is hell, and sucks.
14. On the contrary, the character you hate of yourself is? Noisy, don’t know how to act cool to attract girls , hahaa
(:15. The most ideal person you want to be is? Same answer as IVY OH ! :P (Of cos myself lah. Why must I follow other people?)
16. For people that care & like you. For people whom I’ve hurt: For people whom I love & treasure: Say something to them. For people that care & like you: I would give you guys all my best and bring pride and glory for you guys ! =)
For people whom I've hurt: You can come and ask me why I hurt cos There must be a reason, I’m sorry, Lin li.
For people whom I love & treasure: I love you guys i’ll do everything for you guys but Please don’t take me for granted, I’ll feel sad =(
17. Pass this quiz to 10 people that you wish to know how they feel about you.
-1. Kenneth neo( I want to see his blog !! ) hahaha
1. Kelly Lim
2. Evon
3. Yun fang
4. Melvin small
5. fishy
6. Beverly
7. Si hong
8. Adeline
9. joyce tan
10. Ivy oh !!( question 1-11 ) hahaa
11. Chun fu thia (its till 10 but I want to do so I add in J)
12. kai ling wong (its till 10 but I want to do so I add in J)
13. jack ang kok liang (its till 10 but I want to do so I add in J)
Who is no.6 having relationship with?... still got questions.. erm I guess no one. You got to ask her.
If no.7 and 10 are together, will it be a good thing? OMG, can’t imagine…LOLx
How about no.8 and 5?Erm I guess maybe, a bit disgusting. Lolx
What is no.2 studying about? Same as ME(: Business application
When was the last time you had a chat with no.3? 3-4 days ago ba.
What kind of music band does no.8 , hard question, maybe slow songs ba.
Does no.1 has any siblings? Yes. Two Sisters somemore.
Will you woo no.3? Erm, See how things goes and it’s god’s will. =)
How about no.7? It’s the past ……
Is no.4 single? Hahaaha…. Single ?? yes/ but soon or later sure wouldn’t be single all the best to you and sh =)
What is the surname of no.5? Omg !!!! hahaaahah 33 months of friendship and I don’t know !!! hahaa is it steam ?? cos steam fishy? Haha or zheng cos zheng yu
What is the nickname of no.10? IVY Oh .. hahaha or Assssssss hahahaa
What is the hobby of no.4? Canoeing , pooling hahaa shooting and mah jonging and ask billy to let him drive illegally. hahaha
Do no.5 and 9 get along well? They know each others but not that close ba.
Where is no.2 studying at? Republic Polytechnic.
Talk something casually about no.1? She is one of my good friend and I treasure this friendship =) she is great most of the time but only sometimes, different=) Have you try developing feelings for no.8? Erm , haha…maybe….. lolx but is try only hor .. lolx and its I think school haven start, sit camp… forget liao la. lolx
Where does no.9 live at? One stop before woodlands, cos I don know how to spell, Admirity ?? Correct??
What color does no.4 like? I’m not very sure. Opps*
Are no.5 and 1 best friend?maybe not best friends, haha but good friends, cos they have their own clicks =)
Does no.7 likes no.2? They do not know each other lah. Haha.
How do you get to know no.2? Clubbing , and through ah neo and shirley haha I guess.
Does no.1 have any pets? Yes a Dog !! haaha
Is no.7 the sexiest person in the world? This question is weird….. maybe not sexiest but she’s nice and cute. =)

2007-08-18T13:58:00.000-07:00

I choosed to leave, cos i don want to be zhi zhou dou qing, One sided love.
I know i miss you, but i'll not get near you, cos i need to leave.
I know i am not your Mr.right, thats really sad. :'(
I really wanted hug you , but i know it will never happpen .
To be with you every day, it's the past.
All the sweet memories, it has become the history.

I'm seriously leaving, take care of yourself,
i know you don like it, but it is all because i love you
and now
there will not be someone nagging on you anymore, so take care of urself, haiz.....
i believe to have feelings for another person, we can control it, but nvm , it doesn't matter anymore,
since you have said it all clear that there is no feelings at all. i'll also keep my feelings well. :(

Once again , fallen story of me. :'(

2007-08-16T18:53:00.000-07:00

Remember this song ? played on my blog, it's one of my sweetest memory, the day you asked me to stay. my heart melted. I promise to wait for you for 5 months , but now, i guess i need to break my promise, i don't want you to feel troubled, i'll leave. All the memories we had, i will keep it in my heart. Take care when i am not there, when you need help, just come to me, i'll do my best and don't need to feel bad. Beware of people, not all are good people, they may be good with you but what they're thinking is not that, especially guys. Hope to see you live happily and hope you'll achieve your goals for canoe. take care, bye.
I love you, but i need to leave.
It hurts, but i want you to be happy.
:'(

2007-08-14T20:54:00.000-07:00

On wednesday, Went back to Phs , had fun fair, Whao, it's a happening fun fairs, met up with most of the secondary school friends, saw so many people , then walk around , after which played a soccer match, where we almost win but opponent caugh their last chance and shot a goal , 2-2 draw, we are out, due to first match. then after which went up to the hall for some performance by the Campus superstars. Saturday went to went to amk hub and finally Met up with my brothers, and most of them changed. And louis finally got his bike. Becareful in driving :)

On Thursday, went out with Fabian and mark, to raffles city to see the donut thingy, saw her, hope she would buy donut for me. Erm, she did, went to take the donut from her. After which we went walk around, at marina square, after which went to orchard to walk, talk much while other brother is watch movie, life is so complicate , why does girls behaves like that when guys treat them good. When guys do not treat them good, they complained. Say guys are sucks…. This makes me think back my past, I cried, because that relationship worth so much to me, I gave freedom to you because you told me you’re mine, don worry. But I gave you freedom and you abuse my feelings, haiz till now, going to 3 years I still feel like crying and my heart is not healed, because I don’t find anyone that is willing to accept me. Girls don’t pity me and be together with me, I hate it if I find out.

On Friday, went to school had science lesson. After school went meet fishy and hong to walk around orchard, after which went to eat at Newton, it’s always a good try to learn about everything included ordering nice food with budget, i love you, I want you to learn how to take care of yourself, learn all the things that I can teach you, if you have watch the show, gu wo zai, the girlfriend of chen hao nan is the ideal girlfriend that I want, because she knows how to take care of herself when the bf is not there, don’t let other guys touch her, she rather die than give in to other guys, I respect her, although it’s just a show. She don’t change her heart anyhow, she love chen hao nan and she will always love him , and never change her feelings that is something controllable , it’s your own feelings not others. That’s why I have always nag at you . sorry but I love you , that’s why, I want you to learn.

On Saturday, went to cousin’s house for his baby’s birthday. Thanks ah ma and er gu zhang for what you all have done for me. I appreciate. I’ll be successful and never forget you people. Ah ma, you told me something very important , I am studying and I am studying ! After that meet my friends at cappage, as usual what they usually do. After that went to quan man’s house for bbq, because his new house do not have house warming so ask us to go over to his old house for bbq. I sat on the massage chair and fall asleep, while they are gambling. After that took cab home.

On Sunday, wake up, daddy say got gathering so never go training again. Sad I’m slacking but seriously I have no motivations , once it’s because of you, I want to bring pride for you , that’s why I paddle so hard. But now, … haiz. So after that went out with Fabian again, went for gap interview, it suppose to be Fabian interviewing only in the end I join in, haha lolx don’t hire me , I sucks , haha I can’t commit. Then after which meet up with Andrew and lian xin to buy donut, 1 hour plus , we Q. I really wanted to buy to your work place that day, but I scare you would be angry because you’re working. Send the donut to you, send you home , but again I scare you might be with your work mates. So I did not do so. Went to Funan after that, sat at mac, had a chit chat session, I envy lian xin and Andrew, they both can give in and wont get angry with each other so easily, they care for each other. When one party is sick, another party would take the initiative to at least to buy food or see if what they do for the sick party. I know they are gf and bf but… nvm. After that went lian xin’s house. Watch Man U VS Reading and haiz, disappointed. 0-0 , don’t’ worry . Man U , I’ll still support you ! my heart don’t change so easily. Unless there are factors that make me change.

Xiang zher ni de wen ron
Xiang zher ni de mo yang
Wo fang bu xia.

2007-08-14T18:40:00.000-07:00

I am just fucking pissed !! the entire day i believe.

Can you people appreciate me ?
Never take me for granded !!!
don't force my evil side to come out,
you people wouldn't like it.

2007-08-07T20:31:00.000-07:00

Who ask me to love you ???

Why can't it be both sided love ?

I admit i am strong in most of the things but when it comes to love,

my heart is soften and weak.

when you feel cold, i feel cold too

when you feel hot , i feel hot too

when you are sick, i will be sick too

when you die, i won't die beacuse

i want people to know how wonderful you are when you were alive.

It is because i care and i think about you most the time that i feel the same as you.

I promise i want a girl which is initiative enough and love me and

I will treat you the best i can do , and let you feel that you are most fortunate girl in the world.

2007-08-06T06:06:00.000-07:00

Erm , saturday i went for 1 -star course for my canoeing , erm its like we have know everything about the course but somehow the part where by we need to capsize was scary to me ,as from young i am scare to be in water but seomhow i have overcome it. slowly. after that went bishan eat, then went to melvin's house to take a nap. fishy, ah hong and ben was watching celeste chen's video and i was waken by their noisy. she is really , OMg , i have nothing to say . celeste chen... then send si hong to woodlands because she need to go for her cousin's birthday. alright. i just.... then sunday went out with si hong, went walk around and went to istana, saw president. and took some photo of him before that walk around with fishy till she start work then we also went to buy some donut, then meet up with melvin he sell his pool Q and treated us to eat good food. i would continue again , cos i am still in school now , 9 plus going to 10 le . take care , blog again tml.

2007-07-30T00:16:00.000-07:00

Get it done , its nice , but forever is no a promise.

( haha ivy edited de , lolx stupid pin wen so bad :) ) we had fun .

last thursday, i am so ke lian , after school meet chun fu for the banner we draw together then after that , he went home at 11.30 then i stay there, i was alone, sms people, haiz no one reply so just sit there listen to songs, after which i fall asleep, it was a void deck , many people walk pass and look at me so weirdly. dots but because of cypher, i sacrifics , i waited all the way till it dry, but at 1.30 i wake up ahhh. i was too tired so i pack up and lefted. reach home , fall asleep.

Last friday stay back in school to do my SIT banner, damnn it i do till very pissed so decided to disturb , lolx use the paint to draw people's face, unfortunatly IVY oh is the unlucky one, because she looks so cheeky !! hahaa, after that clear up, lucky got some friends help me , arghh thanks so much really you all are great !! :) helped me so much ,:) smile next time need any help just tell me :). then went to mac with melvin and eVon, say so many lame jokes and , dots stupid melvin anyhow guess also correct , even that secert he also correct , hey evon, dots i really never tell him la. Ben went home first, home was so tired, suppose to accomapny andrew play dota, but fall asleep, very sorry , really too tired le.

Then saturday , went for work again, lolx slack slack, finally rained !! After work we went queensway walk wlak, melvin bought a shoe , levis , then we went , hahahaha TATTOOO. arghh it looks nice , yeah, i'm loving it. then after that took cab to bugis to look for kenneth they all, wanted to eat steam boat but too many people le so we ate Ajisen, not bad la after all the food. then went arcade play the basket ball game, got one guy siao one , almost every ball get in and the speed is fast, after that we go play a gun game 4 person de. then after that go catch toys , arghh sad not manage to catch that winnie the pooh i like de. after that went , again suppose to accompany andrew, but sorry next day got work and i'm tired:) i know you will forgive me :)_

Then sunday , went to work again slack , haha hide inside the guard house then chatted with the people, also i went in and ask one of the sales man if how i can become a sales man , hence i also know more about how BMW works, don wish to specific i guess you all will feel bored. lolx
then after that went back to meet my great friends , haha whao so much changes , louis buying bike le , kelly is working ! good , then the rest not bad ba , after eat we went half court to play cards . then i went home eat dinner, nice dinner , long time no eat my dadddy's dinner le :) after that fall asleep , haha. end of stories

After all , hope i can lead a simple life in rp, find a GF , initiative enough, understand me , care for my feelings and most importantly , love me , and what i can say , i can give all my things , my feelings and everythings for you. trust me i judge love as an importantly in my life, it is a form of motivation for me and all the good things i really want to share , i want my girl to smile everyday. and be happy , i will be successful and make sure you will feel that you are the most happy girl in the world. :) hope next sem, i could be able to have a strong bond class, i could know what i really want in school , and earn enough money , not only that but enough experience to start my career any point of time. daddy , i love you so much , i know you are very old le , i will do my best to look after you and give you xin fu :) friends that are reading my blog, i love you all, once again at least you poeple care. any problem, look for me don worry , if i can i will help , :) smile , 81002336 is always availble , but remember friends not to take me for granded , i always believe helping poeple is good so if one day i find out that you take me for granded , i will be very sad. :(. yeah , i guess no one would be :) yeah take care friends bye . will update more !:)

2007-07-26T00:46:00.000-07:00

21st and 22nd july, sat and sun , working at the BMW show room, . dots i have never encounter such a good job with good pay while you can eat buffet anytime you want , can sleep during break, can sit down , can chat on phone , and sms , almost you have all the freedom. then 24th and 25th , tuesday and wednesday, this time is even more . dots super fun and slack !!! tuesday, in the morning rush to school for UT then afterwhich took cabby to the working place, then 11 start work . to 1.30 whereby to usher the cars to the parking lots. was so so so damn hungry, so i am so looking forward to lunch at 1.30, whao eat alot till very full, then after that went back for briefing what i should do next. oh ya , super lucky , i go where also got friend, i saw my 10 years friend, Kian ann, haha then we all same same, is usher haha so 4 people , we are ushers, so after lunch we was suppose to go do area cleaning , but the country club is to clean liao la !! haha hence the trip became an stroll in the club and see how people play golf. Then after which went back to our hosting room and wait for next task, but after 2 hours , which is 6 there is still no task, i fall asleep, then wait till 8 still NO TASK !! ARGHHH!!! we , the 4 ushers start to feel angry cos the pay so good but nothing to do de !!! Then went TO RUTH house to celebrate ah neo's birthday, come on guys , i know that you all want to have a surprise for ah neo, but still remember what is the objective for that night is to make him happy. and also about the girls that WE, i will take it as WE wanted them to join in is because, all are friends we just want more people so that it will be more happier. also the next day that we went newton , come on ask your self are we so xiao qi , because of you people not letting them go ruth house then we want revenge?? we did not get you people down because the original plan was that we would get car , and only seven people can get in then also that you all have already said you people will feel weird when they are there, come on think from their perspective , would they feel weird when you people are there?? or even you people go , at first you all have already said you people feel weird when they are there, so ?? if we ask you people along wouldn't it be weird too ?? Alright things are over don’t ponder over spilled milks. On Wednesday we 4 ushers repeated almost everything till at 6 , finally new task for us is to serve the costumers , help them carry their golf bags to the car. At this point of time some means came into my mind, why are people working so hard suddenly, because customers are giving tibs . Come on this sucks, a customer offers me but what I believe is that this is one of my job to do so hence I told that customer this is part of my work, it’s okie. Erm I just feel not right about accepting the money. After which rush ourselve down to newton and ran so many place just to buy the 24 cans of ice cream soda . for ah neo hope you are touched. lolx haha

What is love?? Is it a game , I don’t see it as a game. When I love someone I give you my everything, no matter what. It is not like some game where I make you fall in love in me , then I will start to treat you less better than before so that you love me more then after which treat better , then lesser, IT IS NOT A GAME !!!

2007-07-17T01:40:00.001-07:00

Please be more understanding. huh, life is tired, almost everyday not enough sleep. school in the morning , start at 9, got to wake up on 8 .luckily because of my dad fetching me to school, thanks alot papa ! i love you. Then start school and end at 4.30 most of the time i would sleep on 2nd break on the faci's chair , the best place i found to sleep. Then after 4.30, either i have training, cypher or something else, at night i think most of the time must pei andrew:) this few days never cos too tired le. my grades , arghh almost everything , can i be more lucky !??

2007-07-10T23:58:00.000-07:00

Out of the sudden, you form an new impression on me. now i'm confused, but i don't want myself to be in this states, its up to you to choose, till one day you feel that i am the best then you tell me. Since you already says it so clearly, nautral . Come on i don't want be zhi zuo duo qing already, all those things i've done were stupid. no matter how much i love you how much i've done for you, there is no difference made. Really stupid.haha Who will love me ??? i question myself, i am just stupid and naive . who would want to be together with me. lolx i guess i have to become monk or what le.Lolx PLease don't give me fasle hope okie, now i am very straight forward.

My heart aches , really really aches , but i shouldn't show anyone.

The next person would have to take initiative
Omg i blog half way , faci come and talk to me, he ask me my gf what class lol, i say don have , he say he know i every time go her class , help her in her work , help her do rj and like part of her class le .alot things, wah so amazing , he knows so much, lol, so scary. lolx everytime when i go after someone, its like so obvious, everyone would know !! lolx. sometimes i just feel very proud of gf if i have one. i want everyone to know about her , tell everyone how good is her, but some how . hahaa fate just comes and go so fast.

2007-07-08T21:07:00.000-07:00

:) smile. maybe i am stupid or silly, i don't know why.seriously i have to say. You say that i have always treat you more than a friend. i asked myself why and is it right to do so?? at times. because i am wooing after you. If i treat you like normal friend, lolx meaning all your friends is also wooing after you. what i am saying is that. Till the day, you feel that i am worthy for your love and you are ready, tell me then we will go back to the past. Now, i don't wish to take much initiative as later wards, i will make you feeling irritated, not only that, i feel that i am actually zhi zuo duo qing. I am sad and i feel aches in my heart, but i'll still wait for your love .I want to explain.. I always say sorry, because i seriously cherish this relationship and don't wish it to end unhappily. I always took photos of you and make it as my wallpaper, haha it may be me, i am stupid but seriously i miss you , the least i can do to ease the feeling is to look at ur picture. The day i made breakfast for you and asked that question, because i really want to take care of you. and also the breakfast is not to make you feel touch or what, it's bull shit, i know that you wouldn't have break fast when you go for piano, your piano exam is coming and you have skipped some lesson, i really hope you can have a good morning and practise well, hence a breakfast shall make it a nice start. I send you home, because i am worried, i call you, ask you where are you, who are you with, maybe at the starting part of the relationship, i am sensative but later part, i just want care if you're safety. at times i don't dare to ask, i scare if you feel that i am being sensative again . i'm so wrried at times. I change my number, because of that 3 number that i would have free outgoing calls, i always believe we would have long conversations, at times i'm sad. And also i want to have better camera to record our memories. My bag will always have jacket because i know at times you will be cold and i know if i say i will lend you my hand , you wouldn't accept and hence if i have jacket you would use it. There's a point of time that i wanted to leave canoe, cypher and you because i'm stress with my family things, i never let you know, i don't want you to feel worried, but i don't know if you will. the last thing i said before i wanted to leave is, plaese help me take care of her, sorry for the inability that i can't take care of you. i really feel so sorry. that's why i always emphazise remember and learn how to take care of youself. Why did i work so much, partly i work to reduce my family's burden, secondly i really want to bring happiness for you and buy you all the things that you want, bring you to nice nice place to have fun and be happy.smiles :) Have faith on me , if i am a playboy or some bad guys, i have already leave you long ago already and wouldn't C__ for this relationship. Why am i writing all this , again i don't need you to be touch, i just want you to know how much i cherish this relationship. I Really Love you, this is the last time i would say it here, i will hide this feeling, really don't wish to make you feel irriated and be unhappy. It's really like a dream, i hope this dream would become reality and we would be happy everyday together :) smile, bye take care !!! I !!!!! you !!!

Till the day you would give me your love.
I would be happy.
Smiles. i ____ you !! seriously i promise this 3 words for you.

2007-07-05T21:05:00.000-07:00

:)You can treat me cold, or anything you like. I've nothing to say. but i'll still smile and ____you.:)
My heart.....
Please take care of yourself.:)
Hope one day you would choose me and touched..

2007-07-05T20:05:00.001-07:00

I don know what had happen again, maybe you just don want me to be around you. I don know if you had any feelings for me. It's a question mark??? But if it's a single sided love, what i can say is that i'm feeling happy and sweet at times, but somehow i don't undertstand why i also feel hurts at times. It's easy to love someone but hard for someone to love you, but somehow i feel that it's also hard to love someone. It's because of love i've change so much. i'm a stubborn guy, trust me. when i hate something, i'll make sure i do anything to torture it or make it disappear. My temper, i get angry easily, but what, haha i feell that i've changed. Now what i can say is that i'll take anything you want to give. If one day you feel that there's a better guy, leave with him. I deserve it because i'm not good enough. :) smile , i'll still. i only want people to see the happy me:) so that everyone would be happy. i'll still contiune my jokes. :)

2007-07-03T23:28:00.000-07:00

Okie , i guess you just don't want to get into relationship. But seriously i feel is that i tot it was time , thats why i asked and simply to said, people giive out some much of cos they want a return.Or just to say i love you, of cos i want you to love me?? and also Love is that element that motivates people, or people would not do things that they don't usually do. I asked you question such as, " you want me to wait?'' because i want to know if at least there is hope anot. You don't want to ans ,or you gave me sad answer, please don't demoralise me, i am not leechers,i am human being, i have feelings, i will leave if you contiune to demoralise me.haha and now i am very hopeless. i'm confuse and don't know what to do.Haha , try putting ur self in my shoes then you will understand how i feel. :) But Nvm if you are mend to be mine, one day u'll love me like how i love you now. if you're not, i can't do anything too, it is just not fated. Lolx. i just don know why. i really love you so much. lolx. At times really i am pissed off with things, but somehow i don feel like being angry in front of you :) be happy , Afterall i still love you.

2007-07-02T04:40:00.000-07:00

Mango drink... bread with things inside and a rose=P

On saturday, i work till midnight having ot, thats very very tired, but after that decided to give her a surprise on sunday. So after which reached home fall asleep at 5 wake up and prepared, went to market bought all the things i need. After which travelled to the busstop that once she told me sshe will stop there to change bus. Lolx when i reach there , i remembered she told me thats a bridge,alamak i saw 2 bus stop with bridge then don;t know which one. lolx so whenever the bus number comes i would chase from one bus stop to another one to see if she is in there. Then i decided to call her , ahaha she...... okie. then nvm so A surprise so shoudln't let her know, so cannot cll her again. i ran around and finally !!! haha she arrived. so breathless and tired, while sweating. then afterwhich her bus came and we board the bus i gave her the breakfast, then she did not eat as she was rushing to her piano lesson. Then i went to see doctor to get some stuff, lolx only 5 mins , go in tell doctor then come out. then waited for her while getting some rest. then she came down. i pass her the breakfast,the drink, and the rose =P. then we went to the orchard work place. lolx tio ps , say got training in the end they don wnat to go.lolx. then actually asked...... then ......... ya then when work.. so lucky.. manage to be same partner with her, so we said cannot quarrel. lolx then went home. she ttoook cabby from yck to tp.

Erm..................................................................then went home, so dammmn tired but happy and sweet =P. byebye Just hope she will be happy. I hahaahah again....____ you :)

2007-06-29T11:07:00.000-07:00

I guess , saturday sunday , lolx i will not have time to blog le , anyway, today after school wentcypher meeting after which meet up with billy they all then go melvin's house, Sweety Sweety....=p I should have !!! =P. Good night , take care. i will bblog on monday.

2007-06-27T23:14:00.000-07:00

Ytd wanted to go school, but arghhh my dad call and i , haiz too nervous and put my laptop on the top of don know what la.... then drop, haiz every's gone. i am so so so stress , really going to get depression la , don't know what i got to do if my laptop really spoil, what am i going to do man. So i tell myself relax down for the sake of my dad , my friends, her , i need to stand up no matter how many times or how hard i am falling. So i went back to sleep. After some sleep i wake up and quickly get all my things and went to the tech support centre of Asus , did not want to tell the truth that i drop the laptop as i scare there would be much charges but what i told myself never cheat myself or others !! i'll never tell lies unless for good intentions. So after which the tech support men told me to wait for 3 working days or longer. so i tell myself don stress , so i went around walk walk , call friends if they are around but no ones around , went walk walk myself, my head is blank... so after some walk. went to mac alone sat there with a large ice lemon tea, relax and try to reform my thinking . don't stress up, What went through my mind is that i am not the worst in this world, there are much more people which is less fortunate. Don't envy anyone . work hard for youreself. So i refresh myself and went to work at 5 , Wah kao , i lost my way in that hotel !!! and really lost with no direactions and don know what to do next, lucky there some kind hearted people that guide me and lead me. From here i though of something which is, my friends , my dad, or anyone could only show me the path to solving of the problem but what in the actual fact is that i need to face and solve it myself. I'm old enough i guess. After i reach there , start work, the Over time...What i can say is , i'm really stress up, so many document to hand in , in order to allow my Leo to be reactivated. Laptop !!!!! ARGHHHHHHH !!!! spoil !! 3/4 of my laptop screen gone black. HArd disk ,clash !HHHH! no data could be retrieve !! sad. my pictures all gone. Erm i 've not been sleeping , i slept 1 & half hours after Over time work at orchard hotel. reach home slept for 1.5 hours and wake up study for UT..... But no point nothing gets into My brain !! now in class using school's laptop blogging , totally don't know what is going on. She is my motivation. thats why i came to school cos i miss her. If i could solve all this problem all alone , i will be great !.=).... if i gonna work, i don't know how to do my RJ..... sianz. try my best. Now i 'm wear off totally.later got meeting and ceremony , sorry guys, i'm really tired off, not that i'm giving attitude . really sorry. Smile again =p i want everyone to be happy so i would always smile no matter what :) yeah i love everyone that made my life. :) i Miss you !!! blehh=P

2007-06-24T20:26:00.000-07:00

oK ! what i can say is that my grades get from bad to worst.:( so many C ! !! wake up please !!=)
No worries.
ytd wanted go training with xiao mel but really i set the alarm wrongly so in the end nv go , sorry. so after that meet xiao mel went to town with fishy then after which hong come meet us. So after which went east coast to have some roller blading session. Kelvin is my shi fu .:) my teacher. The stars in the sky is perfect and so nice. Hope one day , you will follow me to the place.
okay , now actually i believe that for your happinesss, you got to persue yourself BUT ALSO i feel that if it is mine , no matter how you run , it will still be yours.
I don't know what is every thing going , how's everything ???
Will one day we will ..... be tooooo geeeetttttttt hhhhhheeeeeerrrrrr??? lolx

Hahah, i will bare all the consequence by myself . i will never regret.. no matter what happen.
If i were to be happy , that is good
If i were to cry , no worries i will cry alone .

2007-06-22T00:40:00.000-07:00

Today's lesson about VB !! arghhhh headache , when my team first came in , lolx we can't do anything but play around with that Vb thingy !!! then finally every one go around ask for ppt from friends and finally we have some idea what to do .. lolx Stress la .reallly. Starting work soon le =) finally .

2007-06-21T01:30:00.000-07:00

可愛女人 - 周杰倫 =) 你是我的可愛女人

曲︰周杰倫詞︰徐若瑄編︰周杰倫
＊想要有直昇機　想要和妳飛到宇宙去
想要和妳融化在一起　融化在銀河裡
我每天每天每天在想想想想著妳
這樣的甜蜜　讓我開始相信命運
感謝地心引力　讓我碰到妳
＃漂亮的讓我面紅的可愛女人

溫柔的讓我心疼的可愛女人
聰明的讓我感動的可愛女人
壞壞的讓我瘋狂的可愛女人

世界這樣大而我而我只是隻小小小的螞蟻但我要盡全力全力全力保護妳
漂亮的讓我面紅的可愛女人
溫柔的讓我心疼的可愛女人
聰明的讓我感動的可爱女人

You're my idea gf and my kind of girl , but i may not be that guy you looking for , but for whom i love , i promise i'll change no matter what's the factors, i'll do anything no matter what happen, i'll love you no matter what stops me. And hope one day you will be touched =)

2007-06-20T19:06:00.000-07:00

I guess if i do not want this love story to end now, i need to paragraph it. What i hope now is just only that give me the chance to change , no ones take one day to change. I am trying very hard. I know that i should trust you at the very first part , really sorry. and also please i can promise i will not be your past bfs but yet i will really change , one day, i will become the kind of guy you are looking for . Please give me that chance and hope. She changed passwords, blog links. i guess there are things that i shouldn't know. I really hope i could have a hug but it is almost impossible. When i am not there , i really hope you would take care of yourself. When it's late , ask someone to send you home , when there is no one , call me i will always be on standby. When you're alone , bored call me i can chat with you , don't shop alone next time , call me and i would rush down .

My jacket will always be in the bag , when you are cold, the jacket would be for you , this offer stands forever.

When you need tissue, call me and i would deliever down to where ever you are.

And , My Love for you would always stand still and not weaver. hope one day....

The day i lefted, i promise to bring back something . In order to make my family happy, less worries for my friends and romances for her. What i hope is my family could endure, My friends could be happy and her to wait for me. I know i am no one now but one day you'll see me somewhere near the tip of the world. I am sorry to cypher club , I will miss Canoeing and what i can't put down is her. the very last thing i hope my Friends and brothers could help me , is to take care of her. Wait for my return , i'll be someone different , i will refresh myself and gain back my confidence while changing for her ( Sensative ) Girl, i know that once you had feelings for me but from factors to factors that i have cause, changed everything . I'm sorry i know that i'm wrong . Please don't black list me =) Again , thanks for giving me that chance to start a new , i will cherish it. =) I hope one day i will return and your feelings deep inside your heart will flow out again for me like water falls. I really hope and pray hard =)

Cypher club , i'm sorry , really sorry , the last event would be PM visit and i would have to leave, or maybe half way i have to leave. really sorry , but wait for my return , trust me i would help every thing i could.

Canoeing , i know it is going to be a big challenge for me after my return but What ?? i want to take up the challenge. You will see me on water. Last thing , again what i really put down is her. I would always be there when you all need help . but now i need one help from my Friends and brothers first. I really hope you all will help me take care of her. Thanks so much. I love you .

2007-06-18T23:50:00.000-07:00

Okie, Last evening send her to her destination at hou gang=) Then her parents came fetch her, Omg her Mum actually remember me i tot i could act act around so that they will think i am a stranger :) After which went home , took 161 then to hou gang took 72 home. after which bath and went out to find my daddy again :) Wah i can't find a newspaper for my dad, i went all around to 6 shops whereby it is very far apart just to find , but ha what i get in the end is still newspapers are sold out. so went back to find my dad. chat chat , and went home , was so tired but went to buy some food. Billy called and wanted to come over to stay or ask me to go over to his place , really really thanks but i just feel like being alone :( ya some many things happened in life. Thankz so much. Brothers forever, i really hope it won't be last time again . so many problems in my friends, this one don't like that one , fight and snatch girlfriends here and there , gamble here and there :( ya. Now i finally understand i really hate people to cheat . really so i wouldnot tell lies again. Unless for good intentions.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Love stories need paragraph , we have alreAdy came so far , i really don't wish if the story would end now . please give me the chance really i love you so so so much hope one day you will too. this is the 2nd time i fall so deep with love with another girl . please allows your feelings for me to flow. PleASE i really hope you can be happy every day , don't treat me differently ,this makes me feel that you are not happy and at times i really want to leave you all because of one thing . !!
I WANT YOU TO BE HAPPY .=)

2007-06-17T19:52:00.000-07:00

I Guess i must be Optimistic, Friends, they are my greatest support without them , i can't be studying in Rp and how can my life goes on , My aunties and daddy and my uncles , my relatives , they are great.. My love , i guess i just have to change and hope you give me that chance again . Life's to be happy although tired. This is the 2nd time i fall so deeply with someone. I ____ you !! Really hope one day you will say this to me . =p

Went to xiao melvin's house played mah jong , won so so so so much at first , got a xiao shan yuan , but some how, lost concentration. Kenneth said that when i win in mah jong meaning losing my love, Arghhhh is it true?. please i hope not =( If its true, i 'm willing to lose everything .

I guess we are going well.

2007-06-16T14:45:00.000-07:00

Girl :) i can change . Trust me. Give me that chance to go bAck to that sweet past, and don worry i wont be like ur ex. trust me.i promise. Anything she don't like, i can change !:) Today don't dare to buy breakfast for her scare she wouldn't want it.Was a very tireed day for training , i vomitted 4 times , i guess cos i did not eat breakfast .Cough all the way. TodAY i gave her a morning call . Saw her during training , don't dare to go near her , scare if she would angry and avoid me. After which went bishan eat, feel better. Still don't dare to talk to her . Then later went to melvin's house finally chatted abit then was once close again, i hope it wont change. watch wei siao pasta and Unborn :) Then after that took cab and send her home . :) It's the sweet proccess.

Once again,

.I
.____
.You

2007-06-15T07:25:00.000-07:00

Really sorry that i treated you more than a friend , but it's my feelings that guide me in. You're thinking if the feeling for me is it true . maybe it's me that treat you good that cause you to feel nice about me , but it may not be love. you have the right to choose . i can't do anything but to wait .

End
I still ____ you .

2007-06-14T17:31:00.000-07:00

Really Sorry , i guess i just sensative sometimes. I believe one day trust could bring this jealousy away. really sorry. without statues i can't trust anyone , 2 years before . its because that i trust her too much , what ever she say and what ever she do , i trust her, i don't ask at all. In the end what happened?? unless anyone can promise me that this would not happen again. I really love you . really really . i guess i just have to be less sensative, i trust you. please give me the chance. But if i am not the one you're looking for. please reject me and just tell me on my face before i go into too deep. i really love you . i promise my 3 words for you. i love you .

2007-06-14T05:05:00.000-07:00

Erm, noW at billy house, nothing to do so just blog blog around , Now i finally understand that What does Never Be replaced , that song means ....... :( When ever i hear this song , it gave me an insecure feeling, The day you left me , i cry like shit. did you know ?? its okie for you i guess , 24th dec??? its a nice day my heart ached like hell when ever i see your picture, i cried. It was like a dream, really , every thing happened so fast , when school reopened, whenever i saw you , i really feel that we are still together , but whats the fact is that we are not. That feeling.................................. i remember that day when you leave me, we met up in the MRT , i pass you your present , you pass me your present for me , There's a letter for me ?? okie , SMile , don 't read it now . okie girl. When i reach bus stop and read that supposed to be a happy letter, my heart sank to the buttom of the world. I have got no where to go . I took almost 3 years to get over it. Sorry i guess i am stupid and i feel that i shouldn't blog this but i just feel like the pass again . INSECURITY IS everything for me to get over now. Really sorry , i guess i'm just not suitable to get into relationship , i made everyone not happy. Sorry . really Sorry. All along i've tried to help as many people as possible in their relationship becos i know i can't have a good one so i envy and really don't wish people to end up like me . In the end i suffered, i can't solve mine own ....Every thing just crashed me today. Went to xiao melvin's house ytd ton over night . morning went for training , bought break fast for her, guess she haven eat her break fast But i guess she wouldn want. i leave it at the chair. CPF board called me i have to trouble my auntie again for her birth cert , why am i so idiot , keep disturbing people ..... Tan tock seng called me , my dad have to go for check up , at first 15th, changed to 2nd july , now change again !!! to 21st to 22nd june , then !!!! My MUM !!!!! called me asking me to go ice skating tml , what should i do ???? i don't think i'll be going . sorry, i tolded a lie to her , really sorry !! really. i don't wnat my dad to feel insecure . tan tock seng ??? billing ??? Hpt ??? what is happening to it . my future ??? how am i going to survive in rp for the next 2 and a half year ??? i'm deAD , i though i could just have a love story , motivates me , share my problems love her , i gave out everything each time . i don't get anything . really i'm dead. sorry man . i really feel super sad now .... everything for me just don work out . i am weared off.. i don't think i can't contiune anymore. i cried so easily .. why . why am i so stupid. .... i hope it wouldn't be one sided love??? .. haiz . i still love you but i'm dead... people have wonderful family , friends and loves... i don't even have a single of it . i'm dead..................... i tried so hard each time to pursue for it . see once again . every thing just turn out ,,,,,,, so sadly....byebye...

2007-06-13T14:37:00.000-07:00

Today , did not went for training , after that went to bishan to look for canoeist , then later went for cypher meeting , PM visit. Then after which went to china town eat :) i love her !!! yeah , then went home that time made her abit irritated, sorry okie, cos i tot you angry. :) i guess i am abi t sensative ba, but i really scare you angry, anw , last part went i send her home on bus, :) finially she smiled..:) yeah I love you !!! then went home to eat and change now at melvin house , haha tml got training yeah, see you tml !! byebye. take care dudes !!.

2007-06-13T00:53:00.000-07:00

So many things but so little time. I'm looking forward to the future but not my past. History made my knowledge and experience but i don't wish to go back to my past, i've learn it all in the hard way, My family back ground, my love stories, and my friend's Bond. My love ones lefted me, some friends go off and my loves don't works.

Hope it would be a good 2nd half of the year. =)

2007-06-12T12:51:00.001-07:00

Arghh, what a big planning for HPt !!! have trust with each another . ya , we must unite together !!
I really love you , but i guess i have to slowly leave you , unless you feel that u love me too and want me to be at your side. I LOVE you , its not just words but its from my heart !!

2007-06-11T09:58:00.000-07:00

I don't understand , you are not ready for another relationship ?
But some how you are pushing me away . i just feel that my chance is fading am i right ??? can you just re confirm me ?? i am so confuse now , in a lost path.
Msn , i told you we chat differently from last time till now.history Then you said because i treat you differently, more than a friend??? you don't like it ??? This is call love ??? nooo ??? nooo???
Haiz, so lost ........ if you don like me or what, just shoot my face i rather you let me feel sad and cry now than later part. If you feel that we can be together but not now, can you just re confirm me ??? don tell me such things, at least treat me like some one that is wooing after you. if you don't like, just tell me , i would draw everything out and not treat you so good that you don't like. If you like me, also tell me so that i am not so lost. Or one day i really don knwo where to go .....

2007-06-10T20:36:00.000-07:00

With only 2 hours , we made a decision, we decided to have a E-leads camp, under our out source campany. Planning shall take place asap, i hope all grads will give us the fullest support and what we really need now, is all the team work and togetherness Again !!! We once made things happen, i Strongly believe this time round a success would be reached. I did not buy breakfast for her today , cos i scare later she don want to eat and school got things, so later will ask what she wanna eat :)

2007-06-10T11:01:00.000-07:00

OK, i am not trying to be romantic or speak big words, what i want to say is true from my heart.

What i can say is that i can't buy the things you want for now, But Seriously, the best gift i have already given you, which is my love.
One part i don understand is why is it that some times you treat me nicely, then one point of time you will treat me so cold, so cold ??? I hope that my love would not feel insecured, this feeling only makes me feel lost, i don't know what u are thinking , if you feels that things are going too fast, tell me , if you feel that my attitude is not good, tell me , i 'll change. If you are choosing me and some one, tell me too, i can try. and also insecurities will links me back to my past where the worst experience i had, is to be cheated...( It Hurts like hell !!!) i know that we are not in any statues and you have the freedom to choose, but don't make me feel like i'm being cheated.Sorry but its my stupid past !!! that hurts me and left the bottle of HCL in my heart which burns at times.
Sometimes, a small surprise , or small words like miss you, hugs or even i____ you or even anything else you can think of could be some of the things to make me feel confirmed, and secured. Or one day i will be a CAr without oil to continues it's journey. I know all this are stupid, but i guess guys just like this type of things or maybe its just me.
You may thinks that i am a play boy or what , or i am playing around, what i can say is that if i am playing around or i am a play boy, i wouldn't have give in so much. People, please do not judge me by my covers.i'm serious , this may be words , you can choose to believe or not but to say is that no point spending time to type stupid things.

"A relationship is a two way street. It's never all your fault or the other persons. You go into the relationship together and work through it all together" This is something i found so meaningful !!
i feel that relationship is a two way street , not matter in any terms or things, both side must do tgt and work hard, like initiative, both side should give in.

LAstly to say is that if one day you want me to leave or i need to leave so that you can be happy i will do so, but the last thing to say is that , i sincerely hope you'll be happy and remember to take care of yourself when i'm not there. =) Smile.

I LoV3 you !!!
Truely and Sincerely,

2007-06-10T03:55:00.000-07:00

:) hey, yeah this few days was rather tired, have so many activities, one after another.
yeah , my feeeling will not fade, i am not a play boy !!! haha
but currently i'm just feeling insecure. yeah don't worry i guess things will turn out fine.
I hope i won't be a car that is not finding its direaction to the destination and run of oil.

I ___ you !!!

2007-06-03T09:58:00.000-07:00

Sorry, girl i can't buy what you like, but i will someday, forive me for my inability okie??:) anw,very good , we've been communicating mch, and every single day, i love you more:) take care byebye.

2007-06-01T11:03:00.000-07:00

Yeah, today went to find her during first break :) we ate together and cheryl , then went to her class, second break went to w1 then with her ,adeline, alan , fishy , baverly. Then accompany her back to class. After school, she waited for me wHao, she will wait for me lehz:) yeah so happy,then i send her to koven, haha cannot every time send her, cos will spoiled her, but i just ove to send her and be with her. yeah, "A relationship is a two way street. It's never all your fault or the other persons. You go into the relationship together and work through it all together" from someone that wrote on friendster, and i feel so correct with this sentence.:) haha, i will wait for you, i just simply love you, but sometimes i just need abit of secure, may i know when would you be ready :) yeah , i love you !!! Girl , i miss you every single bit of time and love you every single bit of my life . lol :) bye !

2007-05-29T20:15:00.001-07:00

WHAtTHEHELL, I LOST HER TAG sorry , suppose to be a present for you :) girl. nvm but i found your comb , haha hiding in my bag. :) treat as the same as last time ok ? i 'll wait. ARgggg :) be ready !!! :) love you !!!

2007-05-29T00:10:00.000-07:00

Yeah i LOVE YOU !!!:) Went to her class, was so sad at first, but we talked.
YEah, Finally i understand:) smile , When you're ready tell me, i will always wait :)
I bought a tag for her during SA fund rising. Hope she like it. Give her after school.

2007-05-28T19:56:00.000-07:00

At this point , i really feel so vex, it's not to be said that drama is not true till you experience it, really when you love someone, you really want that person to be happy and live life to the fullest, hence in this point of time, If i really need to give up, i will, just to make you happy.